The Hindoos as They Are
by Sivachandra Vasu · English · Gutenberg #37722 · 654,201 chars · public domain (US)
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Title: The Hindoos as They Are
Author: Sivachandra Vasu
Release date: October 11, 2011 [eBook #37722]
Language: English
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Transcriber's Note: For this text version, t with a dot underneath
is represented by [t.] as in "ba[t.]h".
THE
HINDOOS AS THEY ARE
A DESCRIPTION OF THE MANNERS, CUSTOMS
AND
INNER LIFE OF HINDOO SOCIETY
IN BENGAL.
BY
SHIB CHUNDER BOSE.
WITH A PREFATORY NOTE BY
THE REV. W. HASTIE, B. D.,
PRINCIPAL OF THE GENERAL ASSEMBLY'S INSTITUTION, CALCUTTA.
London:
EDWARD STANFORD, 55, CHARING CROSS.
Calcutta:
W. NEWMAN & Co., 3, DALHOUSIE SQUARE.
1881.
PRINTED BY W. NEWMAN AND CO.,
AT THE CAXTON PRESS, 1, MISSION ROW, CALCUTTA.
[_The Right of Translation and Reproduction is reserved._]
CONTENTS.
_Page._
PREFATORY NOTE. i
INTRODUCTION. iii
I. THE HINDOO HOUSEHOLD 1
II. THE BIRTH OF A HINDOO 22
III. THE HINDOO SCHOOL-BOY 30
IV. VOWS OF HINDOO GIRLS 35
V. MARRIAGE CEREMONIES 41
VI. THE BROTHER FESTIVAL 90
VII. THE SON-IN-LAW FESTIVAL 92
VIII. THE DOORGA POOJAH FESTIVAL 93
IX. THE KALI POOJAH FESTIVAL 136
X. THE SARASWATI POOJAH 151
XI. THE FESTIVAL OF CAKES 155
XII. THE HOLI FESTIVAL 159
XIII. CASTE 165
XIV. A BRAHMIN 180
XV. THE BENGALEE BABOO 191
XVI. THE KOBIRAJ, OR NATIVE PHYSICIAN 209
XVII. HINDOO FEMALES 216
XVIII. POLYGAMY 227
XIX. HINDOO WIDOWS 237
XX. SICKNESS, DEATH, AND SHRAD OR FUNERAL CEREMONIES 246
XXI. SUTTEE, OR THE IMMOLATION OF HINDOO WIDOWS 272
XXII. THE ADMIRED STORY OF SABITRI BRATA, OR THE
WONDERFUL TRIUMPH OF EXALTED CHASTITY 280
APPENDIX 293
ERRATA.
Page 49, line 4, for "_Butterfly_," read, "_Prajapati_--the (Lord.)"
PREFATORY NOTE.
Babu Shib Chunder Bose is an enlightened Bengali, of matured conviction
and character, who, having received the stirring impulse of Western
culture and thought during the early period of Dr. Duff's work in the
General Assembly's Institution, has continued faithful to it through all
these long and changeful years. His extended and varied experience, his
careful habit of observation and contrast, his large store of general
reading and information, and his rare sobriety and earnestness of
judgment, eminently qualify him for lifting the veil from the inner
domestic life of his countrymen, and giving such an account of their
social and religious observances as may prove intelligible and
instructive to general English readers. In the sketches which he has now
produced we are presented with the first-fruits of "the harvest of a
quiet eye" that has long meditatively watched the strange ongoings of
this ancient society, and penetrated with living insight into the
springs and tendency of its startling changes.
Although I had no special claim to any right of judgment upon the
present phases of Hindu life, the writer took me early into his
confidence, and from the apparent quality and sincerity of his work I
had no hesitation in encouraging him to persevere, recommending him,
however, to leave historical speculation to others and to confine
himself to a faithful delineation of facts within his own experience.
While his manuscripts were passing through my hands, I took pains to
verify his descriptions by frequent reference to younger educated
natives, who, in all cases, confirmed the accuracy and reliability of
the details. The book will stand on its own merits with English readers,
whose happily increasing interest in the forms and movements of Hindu
life at this transitional period when the picturesque institutions and
habits of thousands of years are visibly and irrevocably passing away,
should gladly welcome its fresh and opportune representations. And all
who, viewing without regret the decay of the old order and animated by
the faith of nobler possibilities than it has ever achieved, are
actually engaged in the great work of religious regeneration and social
reform in India, should find much in these truthful but saddening
sketches to intensify their sympathies and give definite direction and
guidance to their best efforts.
W. HASTIE.
THE GENERAL ASSEMBLY'S INSTITUTION,
_23rd March, 1881_.
INTRODUCTION.
In presenting the following volume to the Public, I am conscious of the
very great disadvantage I labor under in attempting to communicate my
thoughts through the medium of a language differing from my
mother-tongue both in the forms of construction and in the methods of
expression. My appeal to the indulgence of the public is based on the
ground of my work being true to its name. It professes to be a simple,
but faithful, delineation of the present state of Hindoo society in
Bengal, and especially in Calcutta, the Athens of Hindoosthan. I cannot
promise anything thrilling or sensational. My principal object is to
give as much information as possible regarding the moral, intellectual,
social and domestic economy of my countrymen and countrywomen. The
interest attaching to the information and facts furnished will greatly
depend on the spirit in which they may be received. To such of my
readers as feel a genuine interest in a true reflection of the present
state of society in this country, passing from a condition of almost
impenetrable darkness to that of marvellous light, through the general
and rapid diffusion of western knowledge, I do not think the details I
have given will be found dull or dry. Not a few of the facts stated
will, I fear, prove painfully interesting to those who are cognisant of
the many incrusted defects and deficiencies still lurking in our social
system. But if we carefully look at it we shall doubtless discover that
it is not all darkness and clouds, "it has its crimson dawns, its rosy
sunsets." The multitudinous phases of Hindoo life, though sadly
revolting and repulsive in many respects, have nevertheless some
redeeming features, revealing radiant glimpses of simple and innocent
joys. In discussing the various social questions in their purely earthly
aspects and relationships, it may be I have treated some of them
inadequately and superficially, but in so doing I claim the merit of a
humble endeavour after perfect honesty. I have in no wise exaggerated,
but have simply followed the golden maxim of "nothing extenuate nor set
down aught in malice."
* * * * *
The men of the land, and not the land of the men, form the subject
matter of my work. My attention has long been directed to the domestic,
social, moral, intellectual and religious condition of the Hindoos. The
deep researches of European savants have from time to time thrown a
flood of light on the learning and antiquities of India. We have every
reason to admire the great truthfulness and accuracy of their
observations in many respects. As foreigners, however, they were
naturally constrained to pay but a subordinate attention to the peculiar
domestic and social economy of the Natives. The idea of attempting a
sketch of the inner life and habits of the Hindoos in this age, was
originally suggested to the writer by the Revd. Drs. Duff and
Charles--two Christian philanthropists, whose names are deservedly
enshrined in the grateful memory of the Hindoo community of Bengal, the
great centre of their educational and religious achievements. It was
cordially approved by that high-minded statesman, Sir Charles
Theophilus, afterwards Lord Metcalfe, who practically taught the Indian
Public what a writer in the "_Nineteenth Century_" so aptly calls the
great Trinity of liberty,--freedom of speech, freedom of trade, and
freedom of religion.
To supply this desideratum, and not merely to gratify the natural
curiosity to know the inner life of the Hindoos, but to do something in
the line of social amelioration by "bringing the stagnant waters of
Eastern life into contact with the quickening stream of European
progress," have been the chief aim of the following pages. Should a
liberal Public, here as well as in Europe and America, vouchsafe its
countenance to this my first literary enterprise, I purpose to continue
my humble labor in the same sphere, extending my observation, if
advisable, to a picture of the social life of Upper, Western and
Southern India. The vastness of the subject is one great difficulty. It
will open to all civilized and philanthropic nations a wide and yet
unexplored field for the exercise of their thoughts and sympathies.
To Europeans, and more especially to Englishmen, who have, for more than
a century and a half, been the great and beneficent arbiters under
Providence of the destiny of this vast empire, a correct knowledge of
the domestic and social institutions of the Hindoos, is of the most
vital importance, being essentially indispensable to a right
understanding of the existing wants, wishes, feelings and sentiments,
condition and progress of the subject race. Many erroneous ideas
concerning the singular customs and observances of the people of India
still prevail in Europe and America. They are partly due to defective
observation, and partly to the prejudices of men whose minds are too
pre-occupied to properly understand and appreciate the peculiar phases
of character, manners and usages among nations other than their own.
Such men are unfortunately led to associate the Natives "with ways that
are dark and tricks that are vain." To remove the mass of misconception
yet prevailing in some quarters by placing before the general reader a
true and comprehensive knowledge of the daily life of a people, who
occupy such a huge spot on the earth's surface, and whose numbers are
counted by hundreds of millions, is indeed an important step towards the
solution of a great social problem, and towards the removal of the gulf
that divides the sons of the soil from the English rulers of the
country. The tendency of close and constant intercourse is to promote an
identity of interests between the two races. As a Native, the author may
be allowed to have had the facilities requisite for acquiring a clear
idea of the manners and customs of his countrymen, which may
counterbalance in some degree the drawbacks and deficiencies naturally
experienced by him on the score of language.
The Rev. W. Hastie, B. D., Principal of the General Assembly's
Institution, and Mr. J. B. Knight, C. I. E., have laid me under great
and lasting obligations by their kind suggestions and encouragement. I
have particularly to thank the former for the prefatory note which he
has written in response to my special request.
SHIB CHUNDER BOSE.
I.
THE HINDOO HOUSEHOLD.
It is my intention in the following pages to endeavour to convey to the
mind of the European reader some distinct idea of the present manners
and customs, usages and institutions of my Hindoo countrymen,
illustrative of their peculiar domestic and social habits and the
_inner_ life of our society, the minutiae of which can never be
sufficiently accessible to Europeans. "It is in the domestic circle that
manners are best seen, where restraint is thrown aside, and no external
authority controls the freedom of expression."
I shall begin with a general account of the normal Hindoo household, as
at once the living centre and meeting point of the various elements of
our society. But as it is impossible to describe the manifold gradations
of social condition in a single sketch, I shall draw from the domestic
arrangements of a family of one of the higher castes and provided with a
convenient share of worldly prosperity. Only the principal elements in
the group can now be alluded to, and some of them will be described with
greater detail in separate sketches.
The family domicile of a Hindoo is, to all intents and purposes, a
regular sanctum, not easily accessible to the outside world. Its
peculiar construction, its tortuous passages, its small compartments and
special apportionment, obviously indicate the prevalence of a taste
"cabined, cribbed, confined," and preclude the admittance of free
ventilation and free intercourse. The annals of history have long since
established the fact that the close confinement system which exists in
Bengal, was mainly owing to the oppressions of the Moslem conquerors,
and more recently to the inroads of the Pindaree marauders, commonly
termed _Burghees_, the tales of whose depredations are still listened
to with gaping mouths and terrified interest.
The gradual consolidation of the British power having established on a
firm basis the security of life and property, the people are beginning
to avail themselves of an improved mode of habitation, affording better
facilities of accommodation and a wider range of the comforts and
conveniences of life. From time out of mind there has existed in the
country a sort of domestic and social economy, bearing a close
resemblance to the old patriarchal system, recognising the principle of
a common father or ruler of a family, who exercises parental control
over all. The system of a joint Hindoo family[1] partaking of the same
food, living under the same roof from generation to generation,
breathing the same atmosphere, and worshipping the same god, is
decidedly a traditional inheritance which the particular structure of
Hindoo society has long reared and fostered. This side of the subject
will be enlarged upon in its proper place.
A few words about the respective position and duties of the principal
members of a Hindoo household will be in place at the outset. I shall,
therefore, begin with the _Karta_ or male head, who, as the term
imports, exercises supreme control over the whole family, so that no
domestic affair of any importance may be undertaken without his consent
or knowledge. The financial management, almost entirely regulated by his
superior judgment, seldom or never exceeds the available means at his
disposal. The honor, dignity and reputation of the family wholly depend
on his prudence and wisdom, weighted by age and matured by experience.
His own individual happiness is identified with that of the other
members of the household. There is a proverbial expression among the
Natives, teaching that the counsel of the aged should be accepted for
all the practical purposes of life (except in a few unhappy instances to
be noticed hereafter) and the rule exerts a healthy influence on the
domestic circle. As the supreme Head he has not only to look after the
secular wants of the family but likewise to watch the spiritual needs of
all the members, checking irregularities by the sound discipline of
earnest admonition. In accordance with the usual consequences of a
patriarchal system, a respectable Hindoo is often obliged to support a
certain number of hangers-on, more or less related to him by kinship. A
brother, an uncle, a nephew, a brother-in-law, etc., with their
families, are not unfrequently placed in this humiliating position,
notwithstanding the currency of the trite apothegm,--which says, "it is
better to be dependent on another for _food_ than to live in his
_house_." This saying is to be supplemented by another which runs thus:
"_Luckhee_, the goddess of prosperity, always commands a numerous
train." The proper significance of these phrases is but too practically
understood and felt by those who have been unfortunate enough to come
under their exemplification.
Next in point of importance in the category of the domestic circle is
his wife, the _Ghinni_, or the female Head, whose position is a
responsible one, and whose duties are alike manifold and arduous. She
has to look after the victualling department, report to her husband or
sons the exact state of the stores,[2] order what is wanted, account for
the extra consumption of victuals, adopt the necessary precaution
against being robbed, see that everyone is duly fed, and that the rite
of hospitality is extended to the poor and helpless, watch that the
rules of purity are practically observed in every department of the
household, and make daily arrangements as to what meals are to be
prepared for the day. The study of domestic economy engages her
attention from the moment she undertakes the varied duties in the inner
department of a household, the proper management of which, is, to her, a
congenial occupation, becoming her sex, her position, her habitude, her
taste. Independent of these domestic charges which are enough to absorb
her mind, she has other duties to discharge, which shall be indicated
hereafter.
The next chief constituents in the body of the household, are the
daughters and daughters-in-law, whose relative positions and duties
demand a separate notice. Viewed from their close relationship it is
reasonable to conclude that they should bear the kindliest feelings to
each other and evince a tender regard for mutual happiness, returning
love for love and sympathy for sympathy. But, as elsewhere, unhappily,
such is the depravity of human nature that the operation of antagonistic
influences arising from dissimilar idiosyncracies, embitters some of the
sweetest enjoyments of life. In the majority of cases, a _nanad_, the
sister of the husband, though allied to another family, is nevertheless
solicitous to minister to the domestic felicity of her _vaja_ or the
wife of his brother, but unhappily her intent is often misconstrued, and
the sincerity of her motive questioned. Instead of an unclouded
cordiality subsisting between them, the generous affection of the one is
but ill-requited by the other. Hence, an unaccountable coldness commonly
springs up between them which materially subtracts from the growth of
domestic felicity. Shame on us that a vast amount of ignorance and
prejudice yet renders us incapable of appreciating the highest end of
the social state.
When the several female members of a household meet together, enlivened
by the company of their neighbours and friends (such visits being few
and far between), these first object of inquiry is generally the amount
of ornaments possessed, their workmanship, their value. Few things
please them better than a conversation on this subject, which from the
absence of mental culture, almost wholly monopolizes their mind, despite
the natural tendency of human intellect to a progressive development. If
not thus absorbed, the time is usually frittered away by sundry petty
frivolous inquiries of a purely domestic character. On matters of the
most vital importance their notions are as crude and irrational as they
are absurd and childish.[3] Except in isolated instances, their bearing
towards each other is generally marked by suavity, and kindliness of
manners which has a tendency to draw closer the bond of union between
them all.
It is on such occasions that the amiable loveliness of human nature, is
displayed,--brightening, for a time, at least the otherwise dark region
of a Hindoo zenana and cheering the hearts of its inmates. In a thickly
populated city like Calcutta, with its broad roads and dense crowds at
all hours of the day, without a closed conveyance, either a palkee or a
carriage, no married female is permitted to leave the house even for a
single moment, for that of her sister, perhaps some three doors from her
own. So great is the privacy, and punctiliousness with which female
honor is guarded in the East. The sanction of the male or female head
must, as a standing rule of female etiquette, be obtained before any one
is at liberty to go out even to return a friendly or ceremonious visit.
The reader may form an idea as to the tenacity with which the close
zenana system in a respectable family is enforced, from the circumstance
of a young _Bahou_ or daughter-in-law (the rules being not so strict in
the case of a daughter) being set down as immodest and unmannerly, if
she were accidently seen to tread the outer or male compartment of the
house. If she but chance to articulate a word or a phrase so as to reach
the ear of a male outside, she is severely censured, and steps are
instantly taken, to teach her better manners for the future. Even the
_Ghinni_, or female Head, does not escape censure for a like offence.
With such scrupulous pertinacity is the privacy of the _inner_ life of
the Hindoo society observed. A social line of demarcation is drawn
around the zenana which a genteel Hindoo female is told and taught never
to overstep, either in her conversation or bearing. Woe be to the day
when she is incautiously led to move beyond her sphere, which, for all
the practical purposes of life, is closely hemmed in by a ring of
miserable seclusion, illustrating the scornful lines of the poet:
"Let Eastern tyrants from the light of heaven
Seclude their bosom slaves."
A few advanced Hindoos, more especially the Brahmos, who have received
the benefits of an enlightened education, are making strenuous efforts
to ameliorate the degraded condition of their wives and sisters (the
mothers being too old and conservative to acquiesce in the spirit of
modern innovation) and bring them to the front, if possible, by ignoring
the rules of orthodoxy. But it is the firm belief of such as have been
schooled by experience and observation, that the time is yet far distant
when this bold, sweeping, social revolution shall be brought about with
the general consensus of the people at large. The moral tone of Native
society must be immensely raised, its manners and customs entirely
remodelled, and its traditional institutions and prescriptive usages
thoroughly purified before the consummation of so desirable an object
can be successfully effected.
A Hindoo girl, even after marriage, enjoys greater liberty and is
treated with more indulgence at her father's house than at her
father-in-law's. The cause of this is obvious. From the very period of
her birth, she is nurtured by her mother, aunts, sisters and other
female relatives, no less than by her father, uncle, brothers and other
male members of the family, all of whom naturally continue to bear her
the same love and affection throughout her after life. A mother hugs her
more tenderly, caresses her more fondly, hangs about her more
affectionately, feels greater sympathy in her joy and sorrow, and
watches more carefully how she grows up in health to her present state,
than a mother-in-law. Whether she is eating, talking or playing, her
mother's care never ceases. Should maternal admonition fail to produce
the desired effect, as it does in a few isolated instances, the usual
threat of sending her to her father-in-law's, acts as the most wholesome
corrective.
The social relaxations of Hindoo females have a very limited range. Some
delight in reading the Mahabharat, the Ramayan, tales, romances, etc.,
while others are fond of needle-work, playing at cards, or listening to
stories of a puerile description. Though they seldom come out of their
houses, except under permissive sanction, yet their stock of gossip is
almost inexhaustible. They are generally lively and loquacious, and the
chief passion of their life is for the acquisition of ornaments. They
possess a retentive memory, seldom forgetting what they once hear. Fond
of hyperboles, the sober realities of life have little attraction for
their minds. Their social tone is neither so pure nor so elevated as
becomes a polished, refined community. It is almost needless to add,
that their familiar conversation is not characterised by that chaste,
dignified language, which constitutes the prominent feature of a people
far advanced in the van of civilization. Objectionable modes of
expression generally pass muster among them, simply because they labor
under the great disadvantage of the national barrenness of intellect and
the acknowledged poverty of colloquial literature.
It is a well-known fact that Hindoo males and females do not take their
meals together. Both squat down on the floor at the time of eating.
Except in the case of little girls, it is held highly unbecoming in a
grown up female to be seen eating by a male member of the family. As a
rule, women take their meals after the men have finished theirs. There
is a popular belief that women take a longer time to eat than men. Of
the perfection of the culinary art, the former are better judges than
the latter. They chat and eat leisurely because they have no offices to
go to, nor any definite occupation to engage their minds in. A Hindoo
writer has said, that commonly speaking, they eat more and digest more
readily than men. Naturally modest, they take their meals without any
complaint, though sometimes they are served with food not of the very
best description. The choicest part of the food is offered in the first
instance to the males and the residue is kept for the females. A woman
is religiously forbidden to taste of anything in the shape of eatables
before it is given to a man. Simple in taste, diet and habits, but shut
up in a state of close confinement, and leading a monotonous life,
scarcely cheered by a ray of light, they are necessarily not receptive
of large communications of truth.
The children form an important link in the great chain of the domestic
circle. When sporting about in childhood they have commonly spare
persons, light brown skins, high foreheads beaming with intelligence,
large dark eyes, with aquiline noses, small thin-lipped mouths, and dark
soft hair. The fairness of their complexion is generally sallowed by
exposure to the sun in the earliest stage of childhood.
The child grows up under the fostering care of its parents amidst all
the surroundings of the family domicile. As it advances in years the
mother endeavours, according to her very limited capacity, to instil
into its mind the rude elements of knowledge. From the incipient stage
of early infancy when his mind is rendered susceptible of culture and
expansion, crude and imperfect religious ideas largely leavened with
superstition, are communicated to him, which subsequently mould his
character in an undesirable manner. His early affections and moral
principles are most entirely influenced by the impressions he receives
at the maternal fount, and he seldom comes in contact with the outer
world. He is taught to pay divine homage to all the idols that are
worshipped at stated periods of the year, and his indistinct ideas grow
into deep convictions, the pernicious influence of which can only
afterwards be effaced by the blessings of western knowledge. In the
villages "_chanaka sloaka_" or elementary lessons are still given as a
sort of moral exercise. The mother from want of adequate capacity or
culture is unfit to engraft on the youthful mind the higher divine
truths, to teach the child how to look on men, how to feel for them, how
to bear with them, how to be true, honest, manly, and how to "look
beneath the outward to the spiritual, immortal and divine." Solid,
practical wisdom, however, is often extracted from the most commonplace
experiences, even by untutored minds.
"Honor thy father and thy mother," is the first scriptural commandment
with promise, the importance and excellence of which is early impressed
on the mind of a Hindoo child by wise, discreet parents. And Hindoos are
honorably distinguished by their affections for their parents, and
continue to be so even in the maturer years of their life.
In the case of a girl, even the most elementary sort of instruction is
neglected except that she occasionally studies the Bengallee primer,--an
innovation which the spirit of the times countenances. When of proper
age, she is sent to a female school where she pursues her studies until
finally withdrawn therefrom after her marriage. As a rational being she
may continue to evince a natural desire and aptitude for intellectual
progress and to carry it on by home study according to her taste and
position in life. A few have made astonishing progress, despite certain
formidable obstacles which an abnormal state of society inevitably
interposes. The traditional bugbear of becoming a widow if she were to
learn to read and write has happily passed away, not only in the great
centres of education but likewise in several parts of the rural
districts, where, to all appearances, females are just beginning, as it
were, to assert their right to the improvement of their minds. This is
certainly an unerring presage, foreshadowing the advent of national
regeneration in the fullness of time. Many families being well-to-do in
the world engage a Christian governess[4] both for elementary
instruction as well as for needle-work, the latter being an
accomplishment which even the most matronly ladies have now taken a
great liking for. The introduction of this art of tasteful production
has, in a great measure, superseded the idle, unprofitable gossip of the
day, driving away ennui and slothfulness at the same time.
In almost every respectable Hindu household there is a tutelar god,
chiefly made of stone and metal after one of the images of Krishna, set
up on a gold or silver throne with silver umbrella and silver utensils
dedicated to its service. Every morning and evening it is worshipped by
the hereditary _Purohit_, or priest, who visits the house for the
purpose twice a day, and who, as the name implies, is the _first_ in all
religious ceremonies, second to none but the _guru_ or spiritual guide.
The offerings of rice, fruits, sweetmeats and milk, made to the god, he
carries home after the close of the service. A conch is blown, a bell is
rung, and a gong beat at the time of the Poojah, when the religiously
disposed portion of the inmates, male and female, in a quasi-penitent
attitude, make their obeisance to the god and receive in return the
hollow benediction of the priest. The daily repetition of the service
quickens the heartbeats of the devotees and serves to remind them,
however faintly, of their religious duties. Such a worship is popularly
regarded in the light of an act of great merit paving the way to
everlasting bliss. A suitable endowment in landed property is sometimes
set apart for the permanent support of the idol, which is called the
_debatra_ land or inalienable property, according to the Hindu Shastras.
Some families that have been reduced to a state of poverty through the
reverses of fortune now live on the usufruct of the _debatra_ land,
which serves as a sheet-anchor in stormy weather.
Besides the daily Poojah of the household deity there are some other
extraordinary religious celebrations, such as Doorga, Kali, Lakshmi,
Jagaddhatri, Saraswati, Kartik, Janmashtami, Dole, Rash, Jhoolun,
Jatras, etc., (the latter four being all Poojahs of Krishna) which
excite the religious fervor of the Vaishnavas, as contra-distinguished
from the Saktas, the followers of Kali or Doorga the female principle.
The internal daily details of a Hindu household next demand our
attention. In the morning when the breakfast is ready the little
children are served first as they have to go to their schools, and then
the adult male members, chiefly brothers, nephews, etc., who have to
attend their offices. They all squat down _vis-a-vis_ on small bits of
carpet on the floor, while the mother sits near them, not to eat but to
see that they are all properly served; she closely watches that each and
every one of them is duly satisfied; she would never feel happy should
any of them find fault with a particular dish as being unsavoury, she
snubs the cook and taxes herself for her own want of supervision in the
kitchen, because the idea of having failed to do her duty in this
respect is an agony to her mind.
As a mother, she avails herself of this opportunity to plunge into
conversation, and consult her sons about the conduct of all domestic
affairs, which necessarily expand as there are adjuncts to the original
stock. For example, she takes their advice as to the amount of
expenditure to be incurred at the forthcoming wedding of _Sharat
Shashee_, the youngest daughter, in the month of Falgun, or February.
This is an occasion, when the hearts of both the sons and the mother
overflow with the milk of human kindness, yet there is a desire to avoid
extravagance as far as possible.
A prudent mother wisely regulates her expenses according to the means
and earnings of her sons, and she seldom or never comes to grief. The
idea of an extravagant Hindoo mother is a solecism that has no existence
in the actual realities of life. She is a model of economy, devotion,
chastity, patience, self-denial, and a martyr to domestic affection. She
may be wanting in mental accomplishment, which is not her own fault, but
the very large share of strong common-sense she is naturally endowed
with, sufficiently makes up for every deficiency in all the ordinary
concerns of life. Accustomed to look upon her sons as the pride of her
existence, she seeks every legitimate means to promote their happiness.
If her daughters-in-law turn out querulous, and fall out one with
another, which is not unfrequently the case, she reconciles them by the
panacea of gentle remonstrance. But unhappily, such is the degeneracy of
the present age that the influence of wholesome admonition being
shamefully ignored is often lost in the cataclysm of discord, and the
inevitable consequence is, that vicious selfishness disturbs Heaven's
blessed peace, and "love cools, friendships fall off, brothers divide."
After the sons have gone to their respective offices, the mother
changing her clothes retires into the _thakurghar_(the place of worship)
and goes through her morning service, at the close of which she
prostrates herself, invokes the blessing of her guardian deity, and then
again changing her clothes, takes her breakfast and enjoys a short
siesta, while chewing a mouthful of betel sometimes mixed with tobacco
leaf, in order to strengthen her teeth.
In any sketch of a Hindu family it is necessary that something should be
said about the domestic servants attached to a Hindu household. The
cook, whose employment involves some very important considerations, may
be either a male or a female. In most families, a preference is
generally shewn for a female cook[5] for reasons which are obvious. The
kitchen, being as a rule, placed in the inner division of the house, the
females have an opportunity to assist her in various ways, so as to
facilitate and expedite her work, which certainly is not always of the
most pleasant nature. The dietary of a Hindu family, as may be easily
anticipated, is of the simplest description, consisting for the most
part of vegetables and fishes, with a little milk and ghee, but no eggs
or meat of any kind. Not like the prepared dishes of the French and
Moguls, highly flavored and richly spiced, the daily preparations are
very simple; no onion, garlic, or strong aromatic spices are used. They
are easy of digestion and palatable to taste, being altogether free from
offensive and foetid smell. The simple turmeric, pepper, cummin,
coriander and mustard seeds, etc., generally impart a fine flavor to the
preparations, which the frugal and abstemious Hindoos eat with great
zest. I have known the wives of several rich Baboos, take a delight in
preparing with their own hands the evening meal of their husband and
sons. This is entirely a labor of love, which they go through with the
greatest cheerfulness. It is necessary to mention here that without
fishes, which are very abundant, a nice little Hindoo breakfast or
dinner in Bengal is an impossibility. The art of cooking should not be a
mystery to all save the initiated few, it should be the study of every
good and thrifty woman who is willing to sacrifice needless elegance and
pomp to comfort and economy.
This gastronomical digression will serve to indicate the taste of the
Hindu in Bengal, and the very simple style of their living. Even in the
selection of articles of food a nice distinction is observed; fishes are
dressed in a part of the kitchen quite distinct from where the
vegetable dishes are prepared, because a widow is strictly forbidden to
use anything which comes in contact with fishes. Moreover, a widow would
not accept a dish unless it is prepared by a real Brahmin cook, male or
female. Should a male member of the family be ever disposed to eat goat
flesh (he being forbidden to use any other kind of meat, save mutton,
when sacrificed) a _Sakta_ cook undertakes to prepare it for him. When
finished, she changes her clothes and purifies her body by sprinkling
over it a few drops of Ganges water. Excepting little unmarried girls,
whose parents are _Saktas_ (worshippers of female deities) no other
Hindu female is permitted to use meat even by sufferance. In other
rigidly orthodox families a similar concession is withheld.
The wage of a female cook, who in nine cases out of ten is a widow, is
about six to seven Rupees a month, with a few annas extra for
_Ekadashi_--the day of close fast for all widows--and cocoanut oil for
her hair,[6] six pieces of grey shirtings each ten cubits long, and
three bathing napkins a year. She also gets an extra piece of cloth at
the Doorga Poojah festival, when the most wretched pauper, somehow or
other, puts on new clothes. Some of the widow cooks have certainly seen
better days, but the vicissitudes of fortune have made them hopelessly
destitute. As a rule, they bear the load of misfortune with the greatest
patience. They chiefly come from the villages, and it speaks much in
favor of the purity of their character that they ungrudgingly submit to
the menial offices of a drudge, instead of being seduced into the
forbidden paths of life. Of course there are a few black sheep in the
flock, but happily their number is very limited. A male cook is always
a Brahman. It is almost superfluous to add that the employment in a
family or the admittance of any man-servant into the inner apartment of
a Hindoo household, which is emphatically the great centre, as well of
domestic happiness as of religious sanctity, is open to many objections.
The second domestic servant that demands a notice at our hands is the
_Jhee_, or maid-servant of the family. Her duties are alike onerous and
troublesome. Like the potter's wheel she incessantly turns backwards and
forwards and knows no rest till about ten o'clock at night. She rises
early in the morning, sweeps and washes all the rooms and verandahs
inside the house, cleans all the brass utensils of the family, makes
fire in the stove, pounds the kitchen spices, prepares fishes for
cooking purposes, and attends to other duties of a household nature.
Some maid-servants are almost exclusively employed in taking care of
children. Their duties are not so hard as those of the family _Jhee_
indicated above. These females are often drawn from the dregs of society
and their conduct, or rather misconduct, sometimes leads to the most
unhappy results. Their wage is about two Rupees a month, exclusive of
food and clothes. They occasionally also make something by carrying
presents to relatives and friends.
I next come to the male servants: there are more than a half-dozen of
them in a respectable family, and their services are in the main
confined to the outer apartment of the household. They sweep and clean
all the rooms, spread white cloth bedding on the floor, change the water
of the _hookah_ (the first essential both at an ordinary and special
reception) fill the _chillum_ with tobacco, _kochay_, or trim the fine
black bordered Simla _Dhuti_ and _Kalmay Urani_ (Baboo's native dressing
attire) put in order the lamps, and go to Bazar to make purchases. Their
pay ranges from three to four Rupees a month, exclusive of food and
clothes.
A rich Hindoo, however, has a large establishment of servants in
addition to those mentioned above. There are durwans (door-keepers);
syces (grooms); coachmen, gardeners, sircar, cashier, accountant, etc.,
each of whom discharges his functions in his own sphere, but they seldom
or never come in contact with the female inmates of the household. The
cashier is the most important and responsible person, and his income is
larger than that of any other servant, because he gets his commission
from all tradespeople dealing with the family. All of them get presents
of clothes at the great national festival the Doorga Pujah.
The _khansamah_ of a Baboo is his most favorite servant. From the nature
of his office he comes into closest contact with his master, he rubs his
body with oil before bathing and sometimes shampooes him,--a practice
which gradually induces idle, effeminate habits, and eventually greatly
incapacitates a man for the manifold duties of an active life. Indeed,
to study the life of a "big native swell" is to study the character of a
consummate Oriental epicure, immersed in a ceaseless round of pleasures,
and hedged in by a body of unconscionable fellows, distinguished only
for their flattery and servility.
Except in isolated instances, the general treatment of domestic servants
by their masters, is not reprehensible.
Except such as possess a thorough insight into the peculiar mysteries of
the inner life of the Hindoo society, very few are aware that a
wife--perhaps the mother of three or four children--is forbidden to open
her lips or lift her veil in order to speak to her husband in presence
of her mother-in-law, or any other adult male or female member of the
family. She may converse with the children without fear of being exposed
to the charge of impropriety; this is the systole and diastole of her
liberty, but she is imperatively commanded to hold her tongue and drop
down her veil whenever she happens to see an elderly member in her way.
A phrase used in common parlance (_Bhasur Bhadrabau_) denotes the utmost
privacy, as that which the _wife_ of a younger brother should observe
towards the elder _brother_ of her husband. It is an unpardonable sin,
as it were, in the former, even to come in contact with the very shadow
of the latter. The rules of conventionalism have reared an adamantine
partition wall between the two. We have all learnt in our school-days
that modesty is a quality which highly adorns a woman, but the peculiar
domestic economy of the natives, carries this golden rule to the utmost
stretch of restriction, verging on sacred, religious prohibition.
The general state of Hindoo female society, as at present constituted,
exhibits an improved moral tone, presenting an edifying contrast to the
gross proclivities of former times as far as popular amusements are
concerned. The popular amusements of the Hindoos, like those of many
European nations, have rarely been characterised by essentially moral
principles. But the loose and immoral amusements of the former time do
not now so much interest our educated females. The popular Native
_Jatras_ (representations) do not now breathe those low, obscene
expressions, which was the wont only some thirty years back, yet they
are not, withal, absolutely pure or elevated. It is true that some of
them are touching and pathetic in their themes, not jarring to a moral
sense but admirably adapted to the taste of a people having a supreme
respect for their idolatrous and mythological systems, from which most
of these _Jatras_ are derived. The marvellous and the supernatural
always exact an instinctive regard from the ignorant and the credulous
multitude, destitute of the superior blessings of enlightenment. The
_Panchaly_ (represented by female actresses only) which is given for the
amusement of the females, especially at the time of the second marriage,
is sometimes much too obscene and immoral to be tolerated in a zenana
having any pretension to gentility. On such an occasion, despite a
strict conventional restriction, a depraved taste clearly manifests
itself. Much has yet to be done to develope among the females a taste
for purer amusements, and such as are better adapted to a healthy state
of society.
In Hindoo females there is a prominent trait which deserves to be
commended. Moses, Mohammed, and Manu, observes Benjamin Disraeli, say
cleanliness is religion. Cleanliness certainly promotes health of body
and delicacy of mind. When that excellent prelate, Heber, travelled in a
boat on the sacred stream of the Ganges, seeing large crowds of Hindoo
females engaged in washing their bodies and clothes on both sides of the
river, at the rising and setting of the sun, he most emphatically
remarked that cleanliness is the supreme virtue of Hindoo women. In the
Upper Provinces, at all seasons of the year, hundreds of women could be
daily seen with baskets of flowers in their hands slowly walking in the
direction of the river, and chanting songs in a chorus in praise of the
"unapproachable sanctuary of Mahadev, the great glacier world of the
Himalaya, with its wondrous pinnacles, rising 24,000 feet above the
level of the sea, and descending into the amethyst-hued ice cavern,
whence issues, in its turbulent and noisy infancy, the sacred river of
India." They display a purity, a sincerity, a constant and passionate
devotion to their faith, which present a striking contrast to the
conduct of men steeped in the quagmire of profligacy.
Our ladies bathe their bodies and change their clothes twice in a day,
in the morning and in the afternoon, neglecting which they are not
permitted to take in hand any domestic work.
In the large Hindoo households, the lot of the wife who is childless is
truly deplorable. While her sisters are rejoicing in the juvenile fun
and frolics of their respective children, sporting with all the
elasticity of a light, free, and buoyant heart, she sits sulkily aloof,
and inwardly repines at the unkind ordinance of _Bidhata_ and earnestly
invokes _Ma Shasthi_ (the patron deity of all children) to grant her the
inestimable boon of offspring, without which this butterfly life is
unsanctified, unprofitable and hollow.
The barrenness of a Hindoo female is denounced as a sin, for the
atonement of which certain religious rites are performed, and incessant
prayers offered to all the terrestrial and celestial gods; but all her
superstitious practices proving in vain, only tend to intensify her
misery.
In the beginning of this sketch I set out by stating that the peculiar
constitution of Hindoo society bears an affinity to the old patriarchal
system. This is true to a very great extent. The system has its
advantages and disadvantages, which are, in a great measure, inseparable
from the outgrowth of the social organism. If properly weighed in the
scale, the latter will most assuredly counterbalance the former, so much
so, that in the great majority of cases, discord and disquietude is the
inevitable result of joint fraternisation. Leadership is certainly
organisation; it formed the nucleus of the patriarchal system. But it is
simply absurd to expect that there should always be a happy marriage of
minds in all cases, between so many men and women living together,
endowed with different degrees of culture and influenced by adverse
interests and sentiments. In the nature of things, it is impossible that
all the members of a large family, having separate and specific objects
of their own, should coalesce and cordially co-operate to promote the
general welfare of a family, under a common leader or head. The
millennium is not yet come. Seven brothers living together with their
wives and children under one and the same paternal roof, cannot
reasonably be expected to abide in a state of perfect harmony so long as
selfishness and incongruous tastes and interests are continually at work
to sap the very foundation of friendliness and good fellowship. Union
is strength, but harmonious union under the peculiar regime indicated
above, is already a remarkable exception in the present state of Hindoo
society. If minutely probed, it will be found that women are at the
bottom of that mischievous discord, which eats into the very vitals of
domestic felicity. Segregation, therefore, is the only means that
promises to afford a relief from this social incubus; and to segregation
many families have now resorted, much after the fashion of the dominant
race, with a view to the uninterrupted enjoyment of domestic happiness.
Having briefly indicated in the preceding lines the chief family
constituents of a Hindoo household in their several relations and
characteristics, it is scarcely necessary for me to add, that whenever
this interesting group, consisting of sweet children, loving husbands
and wives, and affectionate parents and brothers, is animated by the
vital, indestructible principles of virtue, practically recognising the
obligations of duty, the divinity of conscience, and the moral
connection of the present and future life, it will be found to diffuse
all the blessings of peace, joy and moral order around the social and
domestic hearth.
FOOTNOTES:
[1] The late Dr. Jackson, who was the family physician of the great
Native millionaire,--Baboo Ashutosh Dey--seeing the very large number of
men and women who resided in his family dwelling house, very facetiously
remarked that the mansion was a small colony. A similar remark was made
by Dr. Duff when he happened to see the numerous members of the Dutt
family in Nimtollah, West of the Free Church Institution. If all the
children and adults, male and female, of the family now, are counted,
the actual number would, if I am not mistaken, come up to near 500
persons, perhaps more.
[2] Natives are always provident enough to lay in a month's supply of
articles which are not of a perishable nature. In the Upper and Central
Provinces, they generally provide a twelve-months' requirements at the
harvest season when prices are moderate. They are thus enabled to
husband their resources in the most economical manner possible.
[3] The following scene will clearly illustrate the point. At an
assembly of some females on a festive occasion, among other current
topics of the day, the conversation turned on the religion of the _Sahib
logues_(Europeans). Impelled by a sense of duty and justice no less than
by the convictions of conscience, I admired the disinterested exertions
of the Christian Missionaries in endeavouring to spread among our
benighted countrymen the benefits of a good education as well as the
blessings of a good religion. Fearlessly encountering all the dangers of
the deep, which, happily for the cause of human advancement, have now
been greatly minimized, renouncing all the pleasures of the world, and
fortifying their minds against persecution, suffering and reproach, they
come, not only among us but travel through the most uncongenial climes
"to preach Christ." The remarkable disinterestedness and self-denial of
some of these Missionaries is a bright reality, to appreciate which is
to appreciate Christianity. Before the propagation of the religion of
Christ, said I, the most admired form of goodness was centred in
patriotism or the love of one's own country, but Jesus brought with him
a new era of philanthrophy, the main pervading principle of which is a
spirit of martyrdom in the cause of mankind. Can we find traces of such
catholicism in our Hindoo Shaster? The universal fatherhood of God and
brotherhood of man is only practically enunciated in the religion of
Christ. The females were all struck with the noble, sublime, yet humble,
forgiving and disinterested virtues of the religion of the _Sahib
logues_. But a pert young female, quite unschooled by experience and too
much wedded to wordly attractions, rather thoughtlessly replied that
"the act of giving education is a good thing in its own way, so far as
it affords a means of earning money, but why do the _Padrees_
(Missionaries) strive to convert our Hindoo boys, and thereby compel
them to forsake their parents to whom they owe their being? What
advantage do they gain by such conversions? This is not good. Brahmo
religion does not demand any such sacrifice. Why do the heads of the
_Padrees_ ache for this purpose? They ought to give all their money to
us, poor women, that we may buy ornaments therewith." Such is the low,
grovelling idea they generally have of Christianity. It is useless to
argue with them, simply because their minds are completely saturated
with deep-rooted prejudice, and narrow, debased, selfish views.
[4] The following incident will doubtless contribute not a little to the
amusement of the reader. One day a governess was giving instructions in
needle-work to a young married girl of thirteen years of age. She, (the
girl) was industriously plying the needle, when lo! an aged female cook
from the house of her husband suddenly appeared before her, and simply
enquired of her how she was. The shy girl, overpowered by a sense of
shame, dropped down her veil almost to the ground, and not only stopped
work but likewise ceased to talk to the governess. The latter struck
with amazement, quietly asked her pupil if she had hurt her eyes because
she held fast her right hand on that part of her face. Other ladies of
the family stepped forward and explained to the governess the real cause
of the awkward position the girl was placed in. It was nothing more nor
less than the unexpected visit of the female cook to the family of the
bride. From feelings of false delicacy in presence of her husband's
cook, she hung down her face and dropped down her veil. The governess
learning the true cause politely desired the female cook to retire that
she might be enabled to give her lessons without any interruption.
[5] Whether descended from a Brahmin or Kayasth family, she goes by the
general name of _Bamun Didi_ (sister) so named that the members of other
families might unsuspectingly eat out of her hands. She is also called
_Maye_ (woman). The entertaining of a middle aged female (generally a
widow) is considered safe and irreproachable.
[6] In order to preserve the hair and keep it clean, all Hindu females
in Bengal use cocoanut oil for the head; they however rub their bodies
with mustard oil before bathing. Young ladies occasionally use pomatum,
bear's grease, soap, etc., which, in a religious sense, is desecration.
II.
THE BIRTH OF A HINDOO.
The birth of a Hindoo into the household of which he is to form an
essential constituent is attended with circumstances which partake, more
or less, of the religion he inherits. It has been said that by tradition
and instinct as well as by early habits, he is a religious character. He
is born religiously, lives religiously, eats religiously, walks
religiously, writes religiously, sleeps religiously and dies
religiously. His every-day life is an endless succession of rites and
ceremonies which he observes with the utmost of scrupulousness
sanctioned by divine veneration. From his very birth his mind is imbued
with superstitious ideas, which subsequent mental culture can hardly
ever eradicate, so strong being the influence of his early impressions.
It is now generally known that Hindoo girls are betrothed even in their
tenderest years, and that the solemnisation of the marriage takes place
whenever they attain to the age of puberty. Thus it is not uncommon for
a young wife to be delivered of her first child in her thirteenth year,
although the glory of motherhood is more frequently not realised until
the fourteenth or fifteenth year. When the period of delivery arrives,
and to her it is an awful period, which can be more easily conceived
than described, the girl writhing under agony is taken into a room
called Sootikaghur or Antoorghur, where no male members of the family
are admitted. She is made to wear a red-bordered robe and two images of
the goddess _Shashthi_ made of cowdung are placed near the threshold of
the room for her daily worship with rice and _durva_ grass, for one
month--the period of her confinement. If in her tender age, the labor be
a protracted one, she often suffers greatly from the want of a skilful
surgeon or even a proper midwife. Before the founding of that noble
Institution, the Calcutta Medical College, proper midwives were not
procurable, because they had had no systematic training; their
profession was chiefly confined to the Dome and Bagthee caste, yet some
of them were known to have acquired a tolerable fortune. Their fee
varied from 5 to 50 Rupees, besides clothes and other gifts; the poor,
certainly, giving less. For some years past, a strong belief has sprung
up among some women that delivery in the name of god Hari Krishna is
very safe. They that follow this religious regime, are believed, in the
majority of cases, to have passed through the struggle of childbirth
quite scathless. They use no _jhall_ or _thap_,[7] bathe in cold water
immediately after delivery, take the ordinary food of _dhall vath_,
curry, fish and tamarind, after offering them to the god Hari, and on
the 30th day make a Poojah (worship) consecrating in honor of the god a
quantity of sweetmeats (_sundesh and batasha_) and finally distribute
them among children and others. This distribution is called Hariloot.
This strong faith in the god seems to enable them to pass the period of
confinement without danger. If the offspring of such women become
strong, their strength is attributed to the mercy of the said god.[8]
A woman that follows the old prescribed practice has to take _jhall_ and
_thap_ and go through a strict course of dietetics, abstaining
altogether from the use of cold water or any cooling beverage. She has
to undergo the action of heat for at least five hours a day. The body
and head of the newborn babe is rubbed with warm mustard oil--an
application which is considered the best preservative of health in
children. Exposure of the mother in any shape, is most strictly
prohibited, and the use of certain indigenous drugs and warm
applications is made as an antidote against all diseases of a puerperal
character.
While undergoing the throes of nature, the exhausted spirit of the
expectant mother is buoyed up by the fond hope of having a _male_ child,
which, in the estimation of a Hindoo female, is worth a world of
suffering.
In the event of the offspring turning out a female, her friends try to
encourage her for the moment by their assurance that the child born is a
male, and a lovely and sweet child, ushered into the world under the
peculiar auspices of the goddess Shasthi. Such assurances serve very
much to keep up her spirit for the time being, but when she is brought
to her senses and does not hear the sound of a conch[9] her delusion is
removed, sorrow and disappointment take the place of joy and excitement,
her buoyant spirit collapses and a strong reaction sets in. Thus in a
moment, a grace is converted into a gorgon, a beauty into a monstrosity,
an angel into a fiend. She curses the day, she curses her fate. But
"such is the make and mechanism of human nature" that she soon resigns
herself to the wise dispensations of an overruling Providence. She
gradually feels a strong affection for the female child and rears it
with all the care and tenderness of a mother; she caresses and fondles
it as if it were a boy, and her affection grows warmer as the child
grows. This is natural and inevitable. At the birth of a male child, the
occurrence is immediately announced by _sanka dhani_ (sound of a conch);
musicians without being sent for, come and play the _tom tom_; the
family barber bears the happy tidings to all the nearest relatives, and
he is rewarded with presents of money and cloths. Oil, sweetmeats,
fishes, curdled milk, and other things, are presented to the relatives
and neighbours, who, in return, offer their congratulations. A rich
Hindoo, though he studies practical domestic economy very carefully, is,
however, apt to loosen his purse string at the birth of a son and heir.
The mother forgetting her trouble and agony implores _Bidhata_[10] for
the longevity of the child. She cheerfully suckles it and her heart
swells with joy every time she looks at its face.
On the second day after delivery, she gets a little sago and _cheeray
vajah_ (a sort of parched rice). On the third day the same diet, with
the addition of a single grain of boiled rice, and a little fried
potatoe or _pull bull_, that she may use those things afterwards with
safety. On the fifth day, if everything is right, the room is washed and
she is allowed to come out of it for a short time; a little boiled rice
and _moong dhall_ is her diet that day.
On the sixth day, the image of the goddess _Shasthi_ is worshipped in
front of the room where the child was born, because she is the
protectress of all children. The Poojah is called the _Seytayra_ Poojah
(worship). Offerings of rice, plantain, sweetmeat, clothes, milk, &c,
are presented to the goddess by the officiating priest, and the
following articles are kept in her room for the _Bidhata Pooroosh_ (god
of fate) in order that he may note down unseen on the forehead of the
child its future destiny, _viz._, a palm leaf, a Bengalee pen with ink,
a serpent's skin, a brick from the temple of the god Shiva, and two
kinds of fruits, _atmora_ and _veyla_, a little wool, gold and silver.
On the eighth day is held the ceremony of _Autcowroy_, or the
distribution of eight kinds of parched peas, rice, sweetmeats, with
cowries and pice, amongst the children of the house and neighbourhood.
On the evening of that day, the children assemble and with a _Koolo_
(winnowing fan) going up three times to the door of the room beat it
(the koolo) with small sticks, asking at the same in a chorus "as to
how the child is doing," and shouting, "let it rest in peace on the lap
of its mother." These juvenile ceremonies, if ceremonies they can be
called, give infinite delight to the children, who are sometimes
prompted by the adult members of the family to indulge in jocularity by
way of abusing the father, not of course to irritate but to amuse him.
At the birth of a female child, in common with the depreciation in which
it is held, this ceremony is observed on a very poor scale. On the
thirty-first day after the birth, the ceremony of _Shasthi_ Poojah is
again performed. Hence a woman who has had as many as twelve or fifteen
or more children, is called the _Shasthi Booree_, or "the old woman of
Shasthi." Before a twig of a _Bata_ tree, the priest, while repeating
the usual incantation, presents offerings of rice, fruits, sweetmeats,
cloths, parched peas and rice, oil, turmeric, betel, betel-nuts, two
eggs of a duck, and twenty-one small wicker baskets filled with _khoyee_
(parched rice) plantain and _batasa_, which are all given to a number of
women whose husbands are alive. It is on this occasion that the priest
is also required to perform the worship of the goddess _Soobachinee_,[11]
said to be one of the forms of the goddess Doorga.
When the father first goes to see the child, he puts some gold coin into
its hand and pours his benediction on its head. Other relatives who may
be present at the time do the same.
All respectable Hindoos keep an exact record of the birth of a child,
especially a male child. Every family has its _Dowyboghee_ or astrologer
who prepares a horoscope in which he notes down the day, the hour and
the minute of the birth of the child, opens the roll of its fate and
describes what shall happen to it during the period of its existence.
These horoscopes are so much relied on, that if it is stated therein
that the stellar mansion under which the child was born was not good,
and that it shall be exposed to serious dangers, either from sickness
or accident, at such a period of its life, every possible care is taken
through _Grohojag_ and _Sustyan_ (religious atonement) to propitiate the
god of fate, and ward off the apprehended danger before it comes to
pass. These papers are carefully preserved by the parents, who
occasionally refer to them when anything, good or evil, happens to the
child. A Hindoo astrologer is a man of high pretensions; he dives into
the womb of futurity and foretells what shall happen to a man in this
life, without thinking for a moment, that our Creator has not vouchsafed
to us the powers of divination. In a court of justice these papers are
of great value in verifying the exact age of a person, and at the time
of marriage, or rather before it, they are carefully consulted as to the
nature of the stellar mansion under which both the boy and girl were
born, and the peculiar circumstances by which they were surrounded. Many
a match is broken off because the twelve signs in the zodiac do not
coincide; for instance, if the boy be of the _Lion rass_ (sign) and the
girl of the _Lamb rass_, the one, it is said, will destroy the other; so
these papers are of very great importance when a matrimonial alliance is
in course of being negotiated.
When a male child is six months old, the parents make preparations for
the celebration of the _Unnoprassun_, or christening, when not only a
name is given to the child, but it gets boiled rice for the first time.
On this occasion, the father is required to perform a _Bidhi Shrad_ so
called from the increase and preservation of the members of the family.
Some who live near Calcutta celebrate the rite by going to Kallee Ghaut,
and procuring a little boiled rice through one of the priests of the
sacred fane at a cost of eight or ten Rupees. When the rice is brought
home a few grains are put into the mouth of the child by a male member
of the family. The ceremony being thus performed the child from that day
is allowed to take prepared food if necessary. Such families as do not
choose to go to Kallee Ghaut observe the ceremony at home, and spend
from 200 to 300 Rupees in feeding the Brahmans, friends and relatives,
who, in return, offer their benediction and give from one to ten Rupees
each to the child, which being shaved, clad in a silk garment, and
adorned with gold ornaments, is brought out for the purpose after the
entertainment. It is on such occasions that splendid dowries are settled
on some children in grants of land or of Government securities, and I
have known instances in which a dowry amounted to a lakh of Rupees. Of
late years, the practice of making gifts to the child being held in the
obnoxious light of a tax, the good taste of some has led them to confine
the rite within the circumscribed limit of their own family.
Superstition has its influence in making the choice of the name given to
the child. The Hindoos are generally named after their gods and
goddesses, under a belief that the repetition of such names in the daily
intercourse of life will not only absolve them from sins, but give them
present happiness and hope of blessedness in a state of endless
duration. Some parents purposely give an unpleasant name to a child,
that may be born after repeated bereavements, believing thereby the
curses of the wicked shall fall innocuous on its head. Such names are
Nafar, Goburdhone, Ghooie, Tincurry, Panchcurry, Dookhi, &c. In the case
of females, she who has many daughters, and does not wish for more,
gives them such names as _Khaynto_ (cessation,) _Arna_ (no more,)
_Ghyrna_ (despised,) _Chee chee_ (expression of contempt.)[12]
Except under extraordinary circumstances, a Hindoo mother[13] seldom
engages a wet nurse; she continues to suckle her child till it is three
or four years old, and attends at the same time to her numerous
household duties, which are by no means light or easy. Indolent
loveliness, reclining on a sofa, is not a truthful picture of her life;
it may be she has to cook for her husband, because he is such an
orthodox Hindoo that he will on no account accept prepared food (such as
rice, dhall, vegetables, curry, &c.) from any other hand. In such
families, the woman has to rise very early, perform her daily ablutions
and attend to the duties of the kitchen, and before nine the breakfast
must be ready, as the husband has probably to attend his office at ten.
It is not an uncommon sight to see a woman cooking, suckling her child,
and scolding her maid servant at one and the same time. A Hindoo woman
is not only laborious, but patient and submissive to a degree; let the
amount of privation be ever so great, she is seldom known to murmur or
complain. All her happiness is centred in the proper discharge of her
domestic and social duties. So simple and unambitious is a Hindoo
female, that she generally considers herself amply rewarded if the food
prepared by her hands is appreciated by those for whom it is intended.
It is a lamentable fact that, expert as she doubtless is in the art of
cooking, she is totally incapable of nourishing the minds of her
children with any solid intellectual food worthy of the name. As already
indicated, she communicates to her child what she can out of her own
store of simple ideas and superstitious beliefs, but her best gift is
the care and tenderness which she lavishes upon it, and the wakening of
its young soul to return the sense of her own love.
FOOTNOTES:
[7] _Jhall_ is a preparation of certain drugs to act as an antidote
against cold, puerperal fever and other diseases incident to child
birth. It often proves efficacious. _Thap_ is the application of heat to
the body.
[8] For observances during the period of pregnancy, see Note A in
appendix.
[9] According to custom, a conch or large shell is sounded at the birth
of a male child. Its silence is the sign of sorrow.
[10] Bidhata is the god of fate.
[11] For the popular story of the goddess Soobachinee see Note B.
[12] Apart from the horrid practice of female infanticide, now put a
stop to by a humane Government, many instances might be given of the
extreme detestation in which the birth of a girl is held even by her
mother. Among others I may cite the following: A woman who was the
mother of four daughters and of no son, at the time of her fifth
delivery laid apart one thousand Rupees for distribution among the poor
in the event of her getting a son, when, lo! she gave birth to a female
child _again_, and what did she do? she at once flung aside the money,
mournfully declaring at the same time, that "she has already four
firebrands incessantly burning in her bosom and this is the _fifth_,
which is enough to burn her to death."
[13] In cases where a woman is prolific enough to give birth to a child
every year she is placed under the necessity of weaning her first-born,
and giving it cow milk, a mode of sustenance not at all conducive to its
health.
III.
THE HINDOO SCHOOL BOY.
From the time when the young Hindoo passes from the infant stage of
"mewling and puking in the nurse's arms," till he goes to school, he is
generally a bright-eyed, active, playful boy, full of romping spirits
and a favourite of all around him. His diet is light, and his health
generally good. He usually runs about for three or four years _in puris
naturalibus_, and among the lower classes a string is tied round his
loins with a metal charm attached to frighten away the evil spirits.
When he attains the age of five, the period fixed by his parents for the
beginning of his education, he is sent to a _Patsala_ (vernacular infant
school) not, however, without making a Poojah to _Saraswattee_, the
goddess of learning. On the day appointed, and it must be a lucky day,
according to the Hindoo almanac, the child bathes and puts on a new
_Dhooty_ (garment) and is taken to the place of worship, where the
officiating priest has previously made all the necessary arrangements.
Rice, fruits, and sweetmeats, are then offered to the goddess, who is
religiously invoked to pour her benediction on the head of the child.
After this, the priest takes away all the things offered to the goddess,
with his usual gift of one or two rupees, and the child is taken by his
parents to the _Patsala_ and formally introduced to the
_Gooroomahashoy_, or master of the school. Curious as little children
naturally are, all present gaze on the new comer as if he were a being
of a strange species. But time soon wears off the gloss of novelty and
everything assumes its normal aspect. The old boys soon become familiar
with the new one, and a sort of intimacy almost unconsciously springs up
amongst them. In this country a boy learns the letters of the alphabet,
not by pronouncing them, but by writing them on the ground with a small
piece of _kharee_, or soft stone, and copying them over and over again
until he thoroughly masters them. Five letters are set him at a time.
After this he is taught to write on palm leaves with a wooden pen and
ink, then on slate and green plantain leaves, and, finally, on paper. At
every stage of his progress he is expected to make some present to his
master in the shape of food, clothes and money. A village school begins
early in the morning, and continues till eleven, after which the boys
are allowed to go home for their breakfast; they return at two, and
remain in the school till evening, when all the boys are made to stand
up in a systematic order, and one of the most advanced amongst them
enumerates aloud the multiplication and numeration tables, and all are
taught to repeat and commit to memory what they hear. By the daily
repetition of these tables, their power of memory is practically
improved. With a view to encourage the early attendance of the boys, a
_Gooroomahashoy_ resorts to the queer method of introducing the
_hathchory_ system into his _Patsala_, which requires that all the boys
are to have stripes of the cane in arithmetical progression, on the
hand, in the order of their attendance, that is, the first comer to have
one stripe, the second two, and so on, in consecutive order. The last
boy is sometimes made to stand on one leg for an hour or so to the
infinite amusement of the early comers. The system certainly has a good
effect in ensuring early attendance.
The course of instruction in such schools embraces reading in the
vernacular, a little of arithmetic and writing, and such as become
capable of keeping accounts pass for the clever boys. Stupid and wicked
pupils are generally beaten with a cane, but their names are never
struck off the register, as is the case in English schools. Sometimes a
truant is compelled to stand on one leg holding up a brick in his right
hand, or to have his arms stretched out till he is completely exhausted.
Another mode of punishment consists in applying the leaves of _Bichooty_
(a stinging plant) to the back of a naughty boy, who naturally smarts
under the torturing. The infliction of such cruel punishments sometimes
leads the boys to make a combination against the master for the purpose
of retaliation, which generally results in bringing him to his senses.
Hindoo boys are extremely sensitive, and are very apt to resent any
affront to which they are cruelly subjected by their master.[14] The
rate of fee in a village school is from one to three-pence a head per
month, but the master has his perquisites by way of victuals and pice.
There is a common saying among the Hindoos that in twelve months there
are thirteen _parbuns_, or school festivals, implying thereby, that they
are encountered by a continuous round of _parbuns_. On every such
occasion the boys are expected to bring presents for the master, and any
unfortunate boy who fails to bring such is denied the usual indulgence
of a holiday. Little boys are seldom fond of reading, they would gladly
sacrifice anything to purchase a holiday. It is not an uncommon thing to
find a boy steal pice from his mother's box in order to satisfy the
demands of his master at the festival. The principle on which a village
school is conducted is essentially defective in this respect. Instead of
teaching the rules of good conduct and enforcing the first principles of
morality, it often sadly defeats the primary object of a good education,
namely, the formation of a sound, moral and virtuous character. It is a
disgrace to hear a schoolmaster, whose conduct should be the grand focus
of moral excellence, use the most vulgar epithets towards his pupils for
little faults the effects of which are seldom obliterated from their
minds, even in the more advanced period of their life. However, such
days of obnoxious pedagogism are almost gone by, never to come back
again, now that the system of primary education has been extended to
almost every village in India, under the auspices of our liberal
Government. Whilst on this subject I may as well state here that some
forty years ago our Government had appointed the late Rev. William Adam
to be the Commissioner of Education in Bengal. That highly talented and
generous philanthrophist, after a minute and searching investigation,
submitted in his report to Government a scheme of education very similar
to what is now introduced throughout Bengal. The scheme was then ignored
on account of its vast expense, and the Commissioner was so disheartened
at the apathy of Government towards the education of the masses, that a
few days before his departure from Calcutta he took a farewell leave of
some of his most distinguished native friends, and his parting words
were to the following effect: "Your Government is not disposed to
encourage those who are its real friends." This reproach has, however,
been subsequently removed by the adoption of a primary system of
education. The spirit of the times and the onward progress of
enlightened sentiments have gradually inaugurated a comprehensive
scheme, which, although still limited in its range, embraces the moral
and intellectual improvement of the people in general.
In Calcutta, when a boy is six years old, his parents are anxious to
have him admitted into one of the public schools, where he has an
opportunity to learn both the Vernacular and the English languages. He
may be said from that day to enter on the first stage of his
intellectual disintegration. The books that are put into his hands
gradually open his eyes and expand his intellect; he learns to discern
what is right and what is wrong; he reasons within himself and finds
that what he had learnt at home was not true, and is led by degrees to
renounce his old ideas. Every day brings before his mind's eye the grand
truths of Western knowledge, and he feels an irresistible desire, not
only to test their accuracy but to advance farther in his scholastic
career. He is too young however, to weigh well everything that comes in
his way, but as he advances he finds the light of truth illumine his
mind. His parents, if orthodox Hindoos, necessarily feel alarmed at his
new-fledged ideas and try to counteract their influence by the
stereotyped arguments, of the wisdom of our forefathers, but however
inimically disposed, they dare not stop his progress, because they see,
in almost every instance, that English education is the surest passport
to honor and distinction. In this manner he continues to move through
the various classes of the middle schools till he is advanced to one of
the higher educational institutions connected with the University, and
attains his sixteenth or seventeenth year, which is popularly regarded
as his marriageable age.
FOOTNOTES:
[14] _Apropos_, I may mention here the following incident. A few years
back a well-known master of the Hindoo school being placed in a very
awkward position, had to call in the aid of the Police to get himself
out of the difficulty. Sailors and Kaffries--always a set of desperate
characters--were retained by the boys for the purpose of insulting him
on the high road, but the timely interference of the Police put a stop
to the contemplated brutal assault. This had the effect of inducing the
master to behave in future with greater forbearance, if not with more
sober judgment. I forbear giving the name of the indiscreet, but
well-intentioned master, whose connection with the school had
contributed very largely to its efficiency and usefulness.
IV.
VOWS OF HINDOO GIRLS.
When a girl is five years of age, she is initiated by an elderly woman
in the preparatory rites of _Bratas_, or vows, the primary object of
which is to secure her a good husband, and render her religious and
happy throughout life. When the boy is sent to the Patsala, the girl is
commonly forbidden to read or write, but has to begin her course of
Bratas. The germs of superstition being thus early implanted in her
mind, she is more or less influenced by it ever after. Formed by nature
to be docile, pliant and susceptible, she readily takes to the initial
course of religious exercises.
The first rite with which she has to commence is called the "Shiva
Poojah," after the example of the goddess Doorga, who performed this
ceremonial that she might obtain a good husband; and Shiva is regarded
as a model husband. On the 30th day of Choytro, being the last day of
the Bengallee year, she is required to make two little earthen images of
the above goddess, and placing them on the coat of a bale-fruit (wood
apple) with leaves, she begins to perform her worship; but before doing
so, she is enjoined to wash herself and change her clothes, a
requisition which enforces, thus early, cleanliness and purity in habits
and manners, if not exactly in thought and feeling. Her mind being
filled with germinal susceptibilities, she imbibes almost instinctively
an increasing predilection for the performance of religious ceremonies.
Sprinkling a few drops of holy water on the heads of the images, she
repeats the following words: "All homage to Shiva, all homage to Shiva,
all homage to _Hara_, (another name of Shiva); all homage to Bujjara,"
meaning two small earthen balls, like peas, which are stuck on the body
of the images. She is then to be absorbed in meditation about the form
and attributes of the goddess, and afterwards says her prayers three
times in connection with Doorga's various names, which I need not
recapitulate here. Offerings of flowers and bale leaves are then
presented to the goddess with an incantation. Being pleased, Mahadev
(Shiva) is supposed to ask from heaven what Brata or religious ceremony
is Gouri (Doorga) performing? Gouri replies, she is worshipping Shiva,
that she may get him for her husband, because, as said before, Shiva is
a model husband.
Then comes the Brata of Hari or Krishna. The two feet of the god being
painted in white sandal paste on a brass plate, the girl worships him
with flowers and sandal paste. The god seeing this, is supposed to ask
what girl worships his feet, and what boon she wants? She replies: May
the prince of the kingdom be her husband, may she be beautiful and
virtuous, and be the mother of seven wise and virtuous sons and two
handsome daughters. She asks that her daughters-in-law may be
industrious and obedient, that her sons-in-law may shine in the world by
their good qualities, that her granary and farm-yard may be always full,
the former with corn of all sorts, and the latter with milch cows, that
when she dies all those who are near and dear to her may enjoy long life
and prosperity, and that she may eventually, through the blessing of
Hari, die on the banks of the sacred Ganges, and thereby pave the way
for her entrance into heaven.
It is worthy of remark here that even young Hindoo girls, in the
exercise of their immature discretion, make distinction between the gods
in the choice of their husbands. In the first Brata, that of Shiva, a
tender girl of five years of age is taught, almost unconsciously as it
were, to prefer him to Krishna for her husband, because the latter,
according to the Hindoo Shasters, is reputed to have borne a
questionable character. I once asked a girl why she would not have
Krishna for her husband. She promptly answered that that god disported
with thousands of Gopeenees (milk-maids) and was therefore not a _good_
god, while Shiva was devotedly attached to his one wife, Doorga. The
explanation was full of significance from a moral and religious point of
view.
The third Brata refers to the worship of ten images. This requires that
the girl should paint on the floor ten images of deified men, as well as
of gods, with _alapana_ or rice paste. Offering them flowers and sandal
paste, she asks that she may have a father-in-law like Dasarath, the
father of Ram Chunder; a mother-in-law like Kousala, the mother of Ram
Chunder; a husband like Ram Chunder; a _dayur_ or husband's brother,
like Luchmon, Ram's younger brother; a mother like Shasthi, whose
children are all alive; like Koontee whose three sons were renowned for
their love of justice, piety, courage and heroism; like Ganges, whose
water allays the thirst of all; like the mother earth, whose patience is
beyond all comparison. And, to crown the whole, she prays that she may,
like Doorga, be blessed with an affectionate and devoted husband like
Dropadi (the wife of the five Pandooas), be justly remarkable for her
industry, devotedness and skill in the culinary art, and be like Sita
(the wife of Ram Chunder) whose chastity and attachment to her husband
are worthy of all praise. The above three Bratas take place in the
Bengalee month of Bysack, (April) which is popularly regarded as a good
month for the performance of meritorious works. The prayer contained in
the above expresses the culminating female wish in entire accord with
the injunctions of the holy shaster, but how often are the amiable
qualities enumerated above set at naught in the actual conflicts of
life, in which the predominance of evil desires swallows up every
generous impulse!
The next Brata is called the _Sajooty_ Brata. It is solely intended to
counteract the thousand evils of polygamy--an unhealthy, unnatural
institution, which ought to be expunged from the midst of every
civilized community. Though God "has stamped no original characters on
our minds wherein we may read his being," still we can clearly discern
in His superior arrangements for the happiness of His creatures, that
this abnormal practice is directly opposed to His dispensations, so much
so that any one countenancing it, is guilty of a crime, for which, if he
is not amenable to an earthly tribunal, he is assuredly accountable to a
superior and superintending Being, the infringement of whose law is sure
to be attended with misery. To get rid of the consequences of this
monstrous evil, a girl of five years of age is taught to offer her
invocation to God, and in the outburst of her juvenile feeling is almost
involuntarily led to indulge in all manner of curses and imprecations
against the possible rival of her bed. Nor can we find fault with her
conduct, because "an overmastering and brooding sense" of some great
future calamity thus early haunts her mind.
In performing the _Sajooty Brata_, the girl paints on the floor with
rice paste a variety of things, such as the bough of a flower tree, a
Palkee containing a man and a woman, with the sun and moon over it, the
Ganges and the Jumna with boats on them, the temple of Mahadeo with
Mahadeo in it, various ornaments of gold and precious stones, houses,
markets, garden, granary, farm-yard and a number of other things, all
intended to represent worldly prosperity. After painting the above, she
invokes Mahadeo and prays for his blessing. An elderly lady more
experienced in domestic matters then begins to dictate, and the girl
repeats a volley of abuses and curses against her _Sateen_ or rival wife
in the possible future.
"There, stripped, fair rhetoric languished on the ground,
And shameful Billingsgate her robes adorn."
The following are a few of the specimens; I wish I could have
transcribed them in metre.:--
"_Barrey, Barrey, Barrey_ (a cooking utensil)
May _Sateen_ become a slave!
_Khangra, Khangra, Khangra_, (broomstick)
May _Sateen_ be exposed to infamy!
_Hatha, Hatha, Hatha_, (a cooking utensil)
May she devour her _Sateen's_ head!
_Geelay, Geelay, Geelay_ (a fruit)
May _Sateen_ have spleen!
_Pakee, Pakee, Pakee_ (bird)
May _Sateen_ die and may she see her from the top of her house!
_Moyna, Moyna, Moyna_ (bird)
May she never be cursed with a _Sateen_!"
May she cut an _Usath_ tree, erect a house there, cause her _Sateen_ to
die and paint her feet with her _Sateen's_ blood!
I might swell the list of these curses, but I fear they would prove
grating to the ears of civilized readers.
The performance of the _Sajooty Brata_ springs out of a desire to see a
_Sateen_ or rival wife become the victim of all manner of evils,
extending even to the loss of life itself, simply because a plurality of
wives is the source of perpetual disquietude and misery. By nature, a
woman is so constituted that she can never bear the sight of a rival
wife. In civilized countries, the evil is partially remediable by a
legal separation, but in Hindoostan the legislature makes no provision
whatever for its suppression. A feeling of burning jealousy becomes
rampant wherever there is a case of polygamy to poison the perennial
source of domestic felicity. So acutely sensitive is a Hindoo lady in
this respect that she would rather suffer the miseries of widowhood than
be cursed with the presence of a _Sateen_, whose very name almost
spontaneously awakens in her mind the bitterest and the most envenomed
feelings. She can make up her mind to give away a share of her most
valuable worldly enjoyments, but she can never give a share of her
husband's _affection_ to any one on earth. To enjoy the exclusive
monopoly of a husband's love is the life-long prayer of a Hindoo female.
She expresses it in the incipient stage of her girlhood, and practically
carries it with her until the last spark of life becomes extinct. This
certainly indicates the prompting of a very strong _natural_ feeling.
V.
MARRIAGE CEREMONIES.
The Hindoos have a strong belief that to solemnise the marriage of their
children at an early age, is a meritorious act as discharging one of the
primary obligations of life. They are, therefore, very anxious to have
their sons and daughters formally married during their own life-time.
Sometimes children are pledged to each other even in infancy, by the
mutual agreement of the parents; and in most cases the girl is married
when a mere child of from eight to ten years, all unconscious as yet of
the real meaning and obligations of the relation, although her girlish
fancies have been continually directed to it. Matches in the case of
good families are commonly brought about in the following way.
When an unmarried boy attains his seventeenth or eighteenth year,
numbers of professional men called _Ghatucks_ or match-makers come to
the parents with overtures of marriage. These men are destitute of
principle, they know how to pander to the frailties of human nature;
most of them being gross flatterers, endeavour to impose on the parents
in the most barefaced manner. As they live on their wits, their
descriptive powers and insinuating manners are almost matchless. When
the qualities of a girl are to be commended, they, indulging in a strain
of exaggeration, unblushingly declare, "she is beautiful as a full moon,
the symmetry of her person is exact, her teeth are like the seeds of a
pomegranate, her voice is remarkably sweet like that of the cuckoo, her
gait is graceful, she speaks like the goddess _Luckee_, and will bring
fortune to any family she may be connected with." The Hindoos have a
notion that the good fortune of a husband depends on that of the wife,
hence a woman is considered as an emblem of _Luckee_, the goddess of
fortune. This is the highest commendation she can possess.[15]
If the qualities of a youth are to be appraised, they describe him thus:
he is as beautiful as _Kartick_ (the god of beauty), his deportment is
that of a nobleman, he is free from all vices, he studies day and night,
in short, he is a precious gem and an ornament of the neighbourhood. The
Hindoos know very well that the _Ghatucks_ as a body are great
impostors, and do not believe half that these people say. From the day a
matrimonial alliance is proposed, the parents on both sides begin to
make all sorts of preliminary enquiries as to the unblemished nature of
the caste, respectability and position in society of the parties
concerned. When fully satisfied on these points, they give their verbal
consent to the proposed union, but not before the father of the boy has
demanded of the father of the girl a certain number of gold and silver
ornaments, as well as of _Barabharun_, _i. e._, silver and brass
utensils, couch, &c. exclusive of (with but few exceptions) a certain
amount of money in lieu of _Foolshajay_.[16] Before proceeding further,
I should observe that of late years a great change has taken place in
the profession of the _Ghatucks_. The question of marriage, though not
absolutely, yet chiefly, is a question the solution of which rests with
the females. Their voice in such matters has a preponderating influence.
Availing themselves of this powerful agency a new class of female
_Ghatucks_ or rather _Ghatkees_ have sprung up among the people. Hence
the occupation of the male _Ghatucks_ is nearly gone, except in rare
cases where nice points of caste distinction are to be decided. The
great influences of _Shibi Ghatkee_ and _Badnee's_ mother--two very
popular female _Ghatkees_,--is well known to the respectable Hindoo
community of Calcutta. These two women have made a decent fortune by
plying this trade. Though certainly not gifted with the imaginative
powers of a poetic bard of Rajpootana,[17] their suasive influence is
very telling. They have the rare faculty of making and unmaking matches.
From the superior advantage which their sex affords them, they have a
free access to the inner apartments of a house (even if it were that of
a millionaire)--a privilege their male rivals can never expect to enjoy.
When balked by the subtlety of a competitor in trade, by their bathos
they contrive to break a match. Their representations regarding a
proposed union seldom fail to exercise a great influence on the minds of
the Zenana females. Relying on the accuracy of their description, which
sometimes turns out exaggerated, if not false, the mother and other
ladies are often led to give their consent to a proposed union. The
husband, swayed by the counsel and importunity of his wife, is forced to
acquiesce in her choice. He cannot do otherwise because, as our friend,
Baboo Keshub Chunder Sen, has very facetiously observed, "man is a noun
in the objective case governed by the active verb woman."[18]
When a _Ghatkee_ comes up with the proposal of a matrimonial alliance
with an educated youth, the first question generally asked her is, "Has
he passed his examinations?" If so, how many _passes_ has he got?
meaning thereby how many examinations of the University has he passed
through? "Has he yet any Jalpany or scholarship?" These are difficult
questions which must be satisfactorily answered before a negotiation can
be effected. That a University degree has raised the marriageable value
of a boy, there can be no doubt. If he have successfully passed some of
these examinations and got a scholarship, his parents, naturally priding
themselves on their valuable acquisition, demand a preposterously long
catalogue of gold ornaments, which, it is not often in the power of a
family in middling circumstances easily to bestow. The parents of the
girl, on the other hand, seeing the long list, demur at first to give
their consent, but their demurring is of no avail; marry their daughter,
they must. The present ruinous scale of nuptial expenses must be
submitted to at any sacrifice, and after deep cogitation they send a
revised schedule, (as if marriage were a mere matter of traffic) taking
off from it some costly items, which would press heavily on the purse.
In this manner the _Ghatkee_ continually goes backwards and forwards for
some time, proposing concessions on both sides and holding out delusive
hopes of future advantages in the event of the carrying out of the
marriage. There is a trite saying among the Hindoos, that "a matrimonial
alliance could not be completed without uttering a lakh of words."
The parents of the girl on whose head falls the greatest burden, are
eventually made to succumb from a consideration of their having secured
a desirable match, namely, a _passed_ student. If not placed in affluent
circumstances, as is generally the case, they are obliged to raise the
requisite sum of money by loan, which sows, in many instances, the seeds
of much future embarrassment. At a very moderate calculation, a
tolerably respectable marriage now-a-days costs between two and three
thousand Rupees (about L200),--sometimes more. There is another native
adage which says, "we want twine for thatching and money for wedding." A
respectable Hindoo gentleman who has four or five daughters to give in
marriage and whose income is not large, is often reduced to the greatest
difficulty and embarrassment by reason of the extravagantly enormous
expenses of a marriage. The rich do not care much what they are required
to spend. All that they look for is a desirable match. It is the middle
and poorer classes, who form by far the largest aggregate of population
in every country, that suffer most severely from the present enhanced
scale of matrimonial charges. The late Rajah Rajkissen, Baboos Ramdoolal
Dey,[19] Nemy Churn Mullick and other Hindoo millionaires, spent
extraordinary sums of money on the marriage of their sons. The amount in
each instance far exceeded a lakh of Rupees. The annals of Rajasthan
furnish numerous instances of lavish expenditure, varying from five to
ten lakhs of Rupees and upwards, on the solemnization of nuptials. There
was a spirit of rivalry which animated the princes to surpass each other
in magnificence and splendour on such occasions, regardless alike of the
state of their exchequer, and the demoralizing effects of such conduct.
Marriages in such a magnificent style are seldom to be seen in Calcutta
now-a-days, not because of the distaste of the people for such
frivolities, but because of the lamentable decline and impoverishment of
the former magnates of the land. It is painful to contemplate that the
present scale of expenditure among the middle classes has been in an
inverse ratio to their income. The exertions made sometime ago by
Moonshee Peary Lall for the reduction of marriage expenses would have
doubtless conferred a lasting boon on the Hindoo community in general,
if the object had been crowned with success, but as the Legislature has
no control over such matters, relating as they do to purely private
affairs, the noble scheme resulted in failure. It is quite optional with
parties to go to heavy expenses on such occasions; no act of Government
without the voice of the people could restrain them in this respect. Any
social reform to be permanent and effectual must be carried out by the
universal suffrages of the people.
When the preliminaries of a marriage are settled, a person, on each
side, is deputed by turns to see the boy and the girl. It is customary
to see the girl first. When the friends of the bridegroom, therefore,
come for the purpose, they sit down in the outer apartment of the house,
whilst the bride is engaged in her toilet duty. After fifteen or twenty
minutes, she, glittering in jewels and accompanied by a maid servant as
well as by the _Ghatkee_, makes her appearance. The first thing she does
in entering the room is to make a _pranam_ or bow to all present, and
then she is asked to squat down on the clean white sheet spread on the
floor. A solemn pause ensues for a minute or so, when one of the
company, more officious than the rest, breaks the silence by putting to
her a few questions. She naturally feels herself somewhat out of her
element in the midst of so many strangers, and unconsciously shows a
sort of embarrassment even of self conflict almost distressing to
witness. This internal agitation of feeling, arising partly from modesty
and partly from anxiety, causes her even to stammer. Her engrossing
thought for the time being is, according to the early vow she has made,
that she may have a _good_ husband with lots of jewels. "What is your
name, mother?" is the first question. She may diffidently reply in a
half suppressed tone "_Gri Balla_." "Who is that sitting before
you?"--perhaps pointing to the girl's father. She says, "My father."
"Can you read and write?" If she say, "yes," she is asked to read a
little out of her book.
The _Ghatkee_ here plays the part of a panegyrist by admiring the
amiable qualities of the girl, who, she adds, is the very type of
_Luckee_ (the goddess of prosperity.) While this examination is going on
in the outer apartment, the anxious mother, whose heart beats with
throbbing sensations while watching the scene from behind a half closed
window, does not feel herself at ease, until she hears that her daughter
has acquitted herself creditably. Before the girl leaves the room, the
father or brother of the boy puts a gold mohur into her hand as a
tangible proof of approval and bids her retire. It is needless to say,
that she feels herself relieved, quite glad and free, when she again
sees the faces of her mother and sisters, whose joy returns with her
return.
This interview is called _pucca dheykha_ or the confirmatory visit. All
the Brahmins, _Ghatucks_ and _Ghatkees_, and other Koolins who may be
present on the occasion receive two or four Rupees each. The servants of
the house are not forgotten, they too receive each a Rupee. If this
interview take place in the morning, the parties return home without
breakfast, it being customary with them not to eat anything before
bathing and performing their daily worship. If in the evening, they are
treated to a good dinner consisting of the best fruits of the season,
sweet and sour milk and sweetmeats of various kinds. It is on such
ceremonious occasions, that the Hindoos make a display of their wealth
by serving the dinner to their new friends with silver salvers, plates,
glasses and _paundan_, (betel box). Almost every respectable gentleman
keeps a good assortment of these silver articles. They are, however,
reserved for special purposes, and used only on special occasions. As a
rule, the people are not fond of investing their money, like Europeans,
in plated-ware, because it is, comparatively speaking, of little
exchangeable value in times of need and distress.
It is now the turn of the boy to be examined in a similar way as to his
scholastic acquirements. When the father and the relatives of the girl
pay a return visit, they generally bring with them a graduate of the
University. Should the boy be one who has successfully passed the
Matriculation standard, he is not subjected to so strict an examination
as one who does not enjoy the same dignity. In both cases, however, they
must undergo some examination in English literature, composition,
grammar, history, &c. It is a noteworthy fact that a boy however
intelligent and expert in other respects, betrays a lamentable
deficiency, arising from diffidence, when required to undergo an
examination in the presence of his father-in-law and a University
graduate. The thought of failure acts as a heavy incubus on his mind. He
finds himself bewildered in a maze of confusion. If he do not actually
stammer, he talks at least very slowly and diffidently, and if called
upon to write, his hand shakes, and in fact he becomes extremely
nervous. After this trial is over, the boy retires with mingled feelings
of misgiving and complacence. He receives, however, in his turn a gold
mohur. The gentlemen who had come to see him are then asked to a dinner
in the way described above. The same display of silver-ware is made on
the occasion, and nearly the same amount of presents of money made to
the Brahmins, Koolins and others.
When both parties are satisfied as to the desirableness of the union, a
good day is fixed for drawing a _pattra_ or written agreement in which,
say, a Koolin of superior caste, engages in writing to give his son in
marriage with the daughter of either a second Koolin, or, as is often
the case of a Mowleek, an inferior in caste. This _Pattra_ is written by
a Brahmin on Bengallee paper with Bengallee pen and ink (as if English
writing materials would desecrate such a sacred contract) and must
consist of an odd number of lines, such as seven or nine lines. An
invocation of the Butterfly must head the _Pattra_, the purport of which
will run as follows: "I, Ram Chunder Bose, do engage to give my second
son, Gopeenauth Bose, in marriage with Nobinmoney Dossee, the eldest
daughter of Issen Chunder Dutt, who is also bound by his contract; the
marriage to be solemnized on a day to be named hereafter." Here the
signatures of both the fathers as well as of the witnesses follow. When
finished, it is rolled up in red thread. The _Koolin_ gentleman hands it
to the _Mowleek_ gentleman, when the latter embraces the former, and
gives him at the same time _Koola marjada_ and _Pattra Darshanee_, as a
mark of respect for his superior caste,--or about fifty Rupees. The
articles required for the matrimonial contract are paddy, doov grass,
turmeric, betel leaf, betel-nuts, sandal paste, cowries (small shells)
and _alta_[20] all which are considered as conducive to the future
welfare of the boy[21] and girl. When the contract is religiously
ratified, a couple of conchs--one for the bridegroom and another for the
bride--are sounded by the females, announcing the happy conclusion of
this important preliminary, at which all hearts are exhilarated.
Arrangements are now being made for the dinner of all who may be present
at the time. Sometimes fifty to sixty persons are fed. Every care is
taken to provide a good dinner for the delectation of the guests and a
_Pattra_ on this scale costs from 300 to 400 Rupees. The Brahmins,
Koolins, and others, receive, as usual, presents of money and return
home replenished in body as well as in purse.
It is worthy of remark that though the distinction of caste still exerts
its influence on all the important concerns of our social and domestic
life, it is nevertheless fast losing its prestige in the estimation of
the enlightened Hindoos. In former days a Koolin occupied a prominent
position in society, be his character what it might, but now-a-days the
rapid spread of English education, and the manifold advantages derivable
from it, has practically impaired his influence and lowered his dignity.
A _Koolin_ who happens to be the father of a girl married to a
_Mowleek_, is, in the present day, degraded into the rank of his
traditional inferior, simply because he is the father of the girl; he
must even be prepared to submit to all sorts of humiliation and continue
to serve the _Mowleek_ father of the boy as long as the connection
lasts. At every popular festival for at least one year he must,
according to his rank, make suitable presents to his son-in-law, failing
which a latent feeling of discontent arises which eventually ripens into
bitter misunderstanding.
But to return to the marriage contract. After the entertainment, both
parties consult the almanac and fix a day for the ceremony, called
_Gatray haridra_ or the anointment of the boy with turmeric. On that day
the bridegroom, after bathing and putting on a red bordered cloth,[22]
is made to stand on a grindstone surrounded by four plantain trees,
while five women (one must be of Brahmin caste) whose husbands are
alive, go round him five or seven times, anoint his body with turmeric,
and touch his forehead at one and the same time with holy water, betel,
betel-nuts, a _Sree_ made of rice paste in the shape of a sugarloaf, and
twenty other little articles consisting of several kinds of peas, rice,
paddy, gold, silver, &c. From this day, the boy carries about a pair of
silver nut-crackers, and the girl a pair of _kajulnatha_,[23] which must
remain with them till the solemnization of the nuptials, for the purpose
of repelling evil spirits. A little of the turmeric paste with which the
body of the bridegroom was anointed is sent by the family barber to the
bride in a silver cup, her body is also anointed with it. A number of
other gifts follow, namely, a large brass vessel of oil, various kinds
of perfumery, three pieces of cloth (one must be a richly embroidered
Benares _saree_, one Dacca, and the other red bordered), a small carpet,
a silk musnud with pillows, two mats, some gold trinkets for the head, a
few baskets of sweetmeats, some large fishes, sweet and sour milk, and a
few garlands of flowers, &c., all which cost from two to three hundred
Rupees, or sometimes more. A rich man sometimes gives a pair of diamond
combs and flowers for the hair, of the value of two thousand Rupees and
upwards. From this, an idea may be formed as to the lavish expenditure
of the Hindoos on marriages, even in these hard times. A _few_ can
afford it, but the _many_ are put to their wits'-end in meeting the
demands thus made upon them.
Two or three days after the ceremony of anointment, the Bengali almanac
is again consulted, and a lucky day is appointed for the celebration of
_Ahibarrabhat_, so called from its being a feast given just before the
wedding. On this occasion the father of the bridegroom gives a grand
entertainment to the male relatives of the family. As a counterpart to
the same the father of the bride gives a similar entertainment to the
female relatives of his own family, with this difference only, that in
the case of the former no Palkees are required, whereas in the case of
the latter these covered conveyances have to be engaged for bringing in
the females. In either case the number of guests generally varies from
two to three hundred, and as the present style of living among the
Hindoos in the metropolis has become more expensive than that which
prevailed in the good old days, partly from a vain desire to make an
ambitious display of wealth, and partly from the unprecedentedly rapid
increase of the population, which has, as a necessary sequence,
considerably raised the prices of all kind of provisions, an
entertainment of this nature costs from four to five hundred Rupees on
each side. The very best kinds of _loochees_, _kocharees_, vegetable
curries, fruits, sweetmeats[24] and other delicacies of the season are
to be provided for this special occasion.
English friends are often invited to the marriages of rich families in
Calcutta and regaled with all sorts of delicacies from the Great Eastern
Hotel. "The family mansion is splendidly furnished and brilliantly
illuminated. There is literally a profusion of pictures and chandeliers.
All the furniture and surroundings are indicative more of an English
than of a Native house. Dancing girls are hired to impart _eclat_ to the
scene. A _nabat_ covered with tinsel is put up in front of the house,
where native musicians play at intervals, much to the satisfaction of
the mother of the bridegroom and the boys of the neighbourhood, and a
temporary scaffolding made of bamboos and ornamental paper is erected on
the highway in the form of a crescent bearing on it the inscription,
"God save the bridegroom." Male and female servants receiving presents
of gold and silver bangles move about the house gaily dressed in red
uniform, or clothes. As tangible memorials of the happy union, presents
of large brass pots, with oil, plates with sweetmeats, fruits, and
clothes, &c., are largely distributed among the Brahmins and numerous
friends and relatives of the family. This present is called _Samajeek_.
With the exception of Brahmins, who are content with offering hollow
benedictions, in which the sacerdotal class, as a rule, is so very
liberal, everyone else who receives them makes in return presents of
clothes and sweetmeats, the nearest relatives making the most costly
ones. In times of great _logansha_, _i. e._, when numerous marriages
take place, the demand for clothes and sweetmeats is really enormous.
Dealers in those things make a harvest of profit and "the town becomes a
jubilee of feasts."
During the night preceding the marriage, the women of both the families
scarcely sleep, being busily engaged in making all sorts of preparations
for the next day. Very early in the morning, five _Ayows_, or females
whose husbands are alive, take with them a light, a knife, a _Sree_, a
_Brundala_, containing sundry little articles, described before, a small
brass pot, some sweetmeats, _choora_ and _moorkee_, oil, betel,
betel-nuts and turmeric, and go to the nearest tank, sounding a conch,
and touching the water with the knife, fill the brass pot with water.
The above articles being presented as an offering to the brass pot, the
females receive a portion of the eatables and return home sounding the
conch, which is a necessary accompaniment of all religious ceremonies.
What I am now about to describe may be called the _first_ marriage,
because it is invariably followed by a second ceremonial when the union
is really consummated. But it properly forms the binding ceremony, as
constituting the marriage relative between the two youthful parties,
with all its legal and social rights, even if they should not be spared
to live together as husband and wife.
The emptiness and superficiality of the relation, especially on the side
of the childish bride, will be but too apparent, and is but too often
realised in this uncertain life, in the prolonged misery of a virgin
widowhood. On the day of the marriage both the bridegroom and the bride
are forbidden to eat anything except a little milk and a few fruits. The
father of the bride also fasts, as well as the officiating priests of
the two families.
About twelve o'clock in the day, the Mowleek family sends presents of
clothes, sweetmeats, fishes, sour and sweet milk and some money, say
about twenty-five rupees, to the house of the Koolin family, as a mark
of honor to the latter, to which, from his superior caste he is fairly
entitled. This present is called _Adhibassy_. Both the fathers are also
required during the day to perform the ceremony of _Nannimook_ or
_Bidhishrad_,--a ceremony, the meaning of which, as said before, is to
make offerings to the manes of ancestors, and to wish for the increase
and preservation of progeny.
After the performance of the above ceremonies, both the bridegroom and
the bride putting on new red bordered _dhooty_ and _saree_ respectively
at their several houses, are made to bathe; and five women whose
husbands are alive touch their foreheads with sundry little things, as
mentioned before. They have afterwards to go through a few minor rites
which are purely the inventions of the females, not being at all
enjoined in the _Shasters_. It is obvious that the primary object of all
these female rites is to promote conjugal felicity. Strange as it may
appear, it is nevertheless a fact that the mother of the bridegroom eats
_seven_ times (of course but little at a time) that day through a fear
lest the bride, when she comes, will give her but scanty meals,[25]
while the mother of the bride does not eat anything until the marriage
ceremony is over, being impressed with a notion that the more she fasts
the more she will get to eat afterwards.
The females on the side of the bride, with the help of a matron,
exercise their utmost ingenuity, and literally rack their brains, in
devising all manner of contrivances partaking of the character of charms
to win the devoted attachment of the bridegroom towards the lovely
little bride. They resort to numerous petty tricks for the purpose which
are too absurd and childish to be dwelt upon. Credulous as they
naturally are, and simple as they are known to be in their habits, not
to speak of the normal weakness of their intellect, they fondly imagine
that their _thook thak_ or trick is sure to triumph and produce the
desired effect. To give an instance or two. They write down in red ink
on the back of the _Peray_, or wooden seat on which the bride is to sit,
the names of twenty-one uxorious husbands, and go round the bride seven
times. They also write the name of the goddess, Doorga, on the silk
_saree_ or garment which the bride is to wear at the time of the
marriage ceremony, because Shiva, her husband, was excessively fond of
her. They place before her the _Chundi Pooty_, a sacred book treating of
Doorga and Shiva, while her mouth is filled with two betel-nuts to be
afterwards chewed with betel by the bridegroom unawares. Meantime active
preparations are made on both sides for the auspicious solemnization of
the nuptials. At the house of the bridegroom, arrangements are being
made for illumination and fireworks, and the grand _Nacarras_ announce
the approaching departure of the procession. Fac-similes of mountains
and peacocks are made of colored paper spacious enough to accommodate a
dozen persons; hundreds of _Khas gaylap_ and silver staves are seen on
the roadside; groups of songsters and musicians are posted here and
there to give a passing specimen of the vulgar songs of the populace; a
_Sookasun_ or bridegroom's seat elegantly fitted up is brought out with
two boys gaily dressed to fan the bridegroom with _chamurs_;[26]
hundreds of blue and red lights are distributed among the swarthy
coolies, who are to use them on the road when the procession moves. The
bridegroom, being washed, is helped to put on a suit of superbly
embroidered Benares _kinkob_ dress, with a pearl necklace of great
value, besides bangles and armlets set in precious stones and garlands
of flowers. Durwans and guards of honor are paraded in front of the
house; and in short, nothing is left to impart an imposing appearance to
the scene. As has been already observed, there is a growing desire among
the Hindoos to imitate English manners and fashions. A marriage
procession is considered quite incomplete unless bands of English
musicians are retained, and a cavalcade of troopers like a burlesque of
the Governor-General's Body Guard is seen to move forward to clear the
way. A Cook's carriage with a postillion is not unfrequently observed to
supersede the old _Sooksun_, or gilt Palkee.
Before the bridegroom leaves his house he says his prayer to the goddess
Doorga, and makes his preparatory _jattra_ (departure). At this time his
mother asks him, "_Baba_ where are you going?" He answers, "To bring in
your _Dassee_ or maid-servant." Before leaving he receives from her a
few instructions as to how he should conduct himself at the house of his
father-in-law. He is to gaze on the stars in heaven, keep his feet half
on the ground and half on the wooden seat when engaged in performing a
ceremony, and not to use any other betel but his own. The object of
these instructions is to thwart the intention of his mother-in-law that
he may become a uxorious husband, a wish in which his mother does not
share at all, because it is calculated to diminish his regard for her.
In the majority of cases the wish of the mother-in-law prevails over
that of the mother, as is quite natural.
He has next to perform the rite of _Kanakangoolee_, surrounded by all
the women of the family. A small brass plate containing rice, a small
wooden pot of vermilion, and one Rupee, are thrown right over his head
by his father into the _Saree_, or robe of his mother, who stands behind
him for the purpose of receiving the same. This is a signal for him to
come out, and if all arrangements are complete, take his seat on the
bridal _Sookasun_, or carriage. The procession moves forward amid the
increasing darkness. One or two European constables march ahead. The
usual cortege of stalwart durwans follow. The torches and flambeaus are
lighted. The _Khasgalabullahs_ are ranged on both sides of the road; in
the midst are placed bands of native and English musicians. Parties of
songsters in female dress begin to sing and dance on the _Moworpunkhee_,
borne on the shoulders of coolies. The flaring torches are waved around
the procession. Blue and red lights are flashed at intervals. Noise,
confusion, and bustle ensue. Men, women and children all flock to see
the tamasha. Mischievous boys try to rob the lights. And to lend, as it
were, an enchantment to the scene, gay Baboos in open carriages, in
their gala dresses bring up the rear. It is on such occasions that
modest beauties and newly-married brides (_bahus_) come out from the
Zenana, and, unveiling their faces, rise on the tops of their houses on
both sides of the road, in order to feast their eyes on all the pompous
accompaniments of a marriage exhibition. As soon as the procession
arrives near the house of the bride, the people of the neighbourhood
assemble in groups to have a sight of the lord of the day, and four or
five gentlemen of the party of the bride advance to welcome the
bridegroom and his party of friends, who enter, receiving the stares of
the idle and the salutations of the polite. The barber of the family
brings out a light in a _sara_ (earthen vessel) and places it on the
side of the road. Decency forbids me to mention certain of its
constituents.
As the initiatory rite of the auspicious event, the females blow the
conch-shell in the inner apartment, and some more impatient than the
rest peep through the latticed corridor or window, while the bridegroom
is slowly conducted to his appropriate seat made up of red satin with
embroidered fringes, having three pillows of the same stuff on three
sides. An awning is suspended over the spacious compound, and it is
splendidly illuminated with gas lights. Polite and complimentary
expressions of good wishes and of refined native etiquette are exchanged
on both sides, comparing favorably with the rude manners of past times.
"Come in, come in, gentlemen, and sit down, please," is the general cry.
"Bring tobacco, bring tobacco, for both Brahmin's and Soodras," is the
next welcome expression. Boys, especially the brother-in-law of the
bridegroom, now bring him a couple of betel-nuts, to be cut with the
pair of nut-crackers he holds in his hand. He objects and hesitates at
first, but no excuse is admitted, no plea heard, he must cut them in
the best way he can.[27] When all the guests are properly seated,
numbers of school boys sit face to face and begin to wrangle, much to
the amusement of the assemblage. As English education is now all the
"go" among the people, questions in spelling, grammar, geography and
history, are put to each other. The following may be taken as a
specimen: Aushotosh asks Bholanauth, "In what school do you read?"
Bholanauth answers, "In the Hare School." A. continues, "What books do
you read?" B. enumerates them.
A. asks, "What is your pedagogue's name?" B., a little confounded,
remains quiet, meditating within himself what could a _pedagogue_ mean.
A. drawing nearer, asks him to spell the word, housewife? B. answers,
"h-u-z-z-i-f." A. laughs heartily in which he is joined by other boys.
Continuing the chain of interrogations, he asks B. to parse the
sentence: "To be good is to be happy." B. hanging down his head,
attempts, but fails. "Where is Dundee, and what is it famous for?" B.
answers, "Dundee is in Germany." (laughter): A. pressing his adversary,
continues, "What was the cause of the Trojan war?" B. answers
hesitatingly, "The golden fleece!" Thus discomfited, B. takes refuge in
ignoble silence, while A., in a triumphant mood, moves prominently
forward amidst the plaudits of the assembled multitude. "Long live
Aushotosh," is the universal blessing.
Here two or three professional genealogists, having tunics on their
bodies and turbans on their heads, stand up, and in measured rhyme
recite the genealogical table of the two families now affianced,
blazoning forth the meritorious deeds of each succeeding generation.
They keep a regular register of all the aristocratic Hindoo families,
especially of the Koolin class, and at respectable marriages they are
richly rewarded. It is quite amusing to hear how seriously they rehearse
the virtuous acts of the ancestors, carefully refraining from making any
allusion to disreputable acts of any kind. Though not like Chunda, the
inimitable bard and pole-star of Rajasthan, as Colonel Tod says, their
services are duly appreciated by all orthodox Hindoos, who exult in the
glowing recital of ancestral deeds. Their language is so guarded and
flattering that it can offend nobody, except such as do not reward them.
Having the genealogical table in their possession they can easily turn
the good into bad, and _vice versa_, to serve their own selfish ends. An
upstart, or one who has a family stain, pays them liberally to have his
name inserted in the genealogical register, and to be mentioned in
laudatory terms.
In the _Thakoor dhallan_, or chamber of worship, all preparations for
the solemnization of nuptials are now made. The couch-cot, beddings,
carpet, embroidered and wooden shoes--here English shoes will not
do--gold watch with chain, diamond ring, pearl necklace, and one set of
silver and one set of brass utensils,[28] are arranged in proper order,
and flowers, sandal-paste, dooav grass, holy water in copper pans, and
khoosh grass, are placed before the priests of both parties. The
bridegroom, laying aside his embroidered robe, is dressed in a red silk
cloth, and taken to the place of worship, where the bride, also attired
in a silk _Saree_, veiled and trembling through fear, is slowly brought
from the female penetralia on a wooden seat borne by two servants and
placed on the left side of the bridegroom. The agitation of her internal
feelings when brought before the altar of Hymen is greatly soothed by
the wealth of gold ornaments--the _summum bonum_ of her existence with
which her person is adorned. The officiating priest puts into the hands
of the bridegroom fourteen blades of khoosh grass in two small bundles
which he winds and ties round his figures. The priest then pours a
little holy Ganges water into the bridegroom's right hand, which he
holds while the father-in-law repeats a _mantra_ or incantation, at the
close of which he lets it fall. Rice, flowers and doorva grass are next
given him, which he lays near the copper pan containing the holy water.
Water is presented as at first with a prayer, and sour milk, then again
water. The officiating priest now directs him to put his hand into the
copper pan, and placing the hand of the bride on that of the bridegroom
ties them together with a garland of flowers, when the father-in-law
says: "Of the family of Goutam, the great grand-daughter of Ram Churn
Bose, the grand-daughter of Bulloram Bose, the daughter of Ramsoonder
Bose, wearing such and such clothes and jewels, I, Dwarkeynath Bose,
give to thee, Oma Churn Dutt, of the family of Bharadaz, the great
grandson of Dinnonath Dutt, the grandson of Shib Churn Dutt, the son of
Jodonauth Dutt." The bridegroom says, "I have received her." The
father-in-law then takes off the garland of flowers with which the hands
of the married pair were bound, and pouring some holy water on their
heads, pronounces his benediction. A piece of silk cloth called _Laja
bustur_, is then put over the heads of the boy and girl, and they are
asked to look at each other _for the first time in their lives_. While
the marriage ceremony is being performed the boy is made to wear on his
head a conical tinsel hat. Here the barber of the bridegroom gives to
the priest a little _Khoye_ (parched rice) and a little ghee, which are
offered with doorva grass to the god Brahma. A very small piece of
coarse cloth called _gatchara_, or knotted cloth, containing in all
twenty-one myrobolans, _boyra_ fruit and betel-nuts, is tied to the
silk _dhobja_ or scarf of the bridegroom, which is fastened again to the
silk garment of the bride, thus symbolising a union never to be severed.
The married couple are then taken into the inner court where the females
are waiting on the tiptoe of expectation, wreathed for a moment in the
rapturous embraces of one another. As soon as the boy appears, or rather
before his appearance, conch-shells are again blown, and he is made to
stand on a stone placed under a small awning called _chadlahtalah_, a
temporary shed, surrounded on four sides by plantain trees. By way of
merriment, some females greet him with _hayeumllah_ mixed in treacle,
some pull his ears, notably his sisters-in-law, while matrons cry out
"_ulu, ulu, ulu_," sounds indicative of excessive joy. It would require
the masterly pen of a Sir Walter Scott to adequately delineate the
joyous feelings of the females on such an auspicious occasion.
The bridegroom is made to wear on his ten fingers ten rings made of
twigs of creepers, and his hands are tied by a piece of thread as long
as his body. Putting betwixt them a weaver's shuttle, the mother-in-law
says, "I have bound thee by thread, bought thee with cowries, and put a
shuttle betwixt thy hands, now bleat thou like a lamb,[29] Bapoo,"--a
term of endearment. She also closes his mouth by touching his lips with
a padlock, and symbolically sewing the same with twenty-one pins, that
he may never scold the girl; touches his nose with a slender Bamboo pipe
and breaks it afterwards, throws over his body treacle and rice, as well
as the refuse of spices pounded on a grindstone, which has been kept
covered with a bag for eight days, are alive, by two females whose
husbands and finally touches his lips with honey and small images made
of sugar, that he may ever treat his wife like a _sweet_ darling.
Afterwards the mother-in-law with several other married women, adorned
with all their costly ornaments and dressed in their best attire, touch
his forehead with _Sree_, _Barandalla_ a winnowing fan, plantain, betel
and betel-nuts; and here the silk scarf of the boy, of which mention has
been made before, is again more closely fastened to the silk garment of
the girl, and kept with her for eight days, after which it is returned,
accompanied by presents of sweetmeats, fishes and curdled milk. These
puerile rites, purely the invention of females, are intended to act as
charms for securing the love and affection of the husband for his wife.
The wish is certainly a good one, but often the agencies employed fail
to produce the desired effect! "Charms strike the sight, but merit wins
the soul." Before the marriage ceremony is concluded, the boys of the
neighbourhood make the usual demand of _Gramva[t.]i_ and _Barawari_ Poojah.
At first in a polite way they ask the father of the bridegroom for the
gift. He offers twenty Rupees, but they insist on having one hundred
Rupees. After some altercation in which sometimes high words and
offensive language are made use of,[30] the matter is eventually settled
on payment of thirty-two Rupees. This money is used in giving a feast to
the boys of the neighbourhood, reserving a portion for the _Barawari_
poojah,--a mode of worship which will be more fully treated in another
place.
As an epilogue to the nuptial rite, the bridegroom continues to stand on
a stone, while two men setting the bride on a wooden seat, and lifting
her higher than his head, makes three circumambulations, asking the
females at the same time who is taller, the bridegroom or the bride? The
stereotyped response is, "the bride." This being done, the females
throwing a piece of cloth over the heads of both, desire them to glance
at each other with all the fond endearments of a wedded pair. As is to
be expected, the coy girl, almost in a state of trepidation, casts but a
transient look, and veils her face instanter; but the boy, young as he
is, feels inwardly happy to view the lovely face of his future wife.
This look is called _Shoovadristi_ or "the auspicious sight" which is
held in the light of a harbinger of future felicity.
The bridegroom returns to the _Thacoordhallan_ or place of worship and
performs the concluding part of the marriage ceremony, while the
officiating priest, repeating the usual incantation, presents the burnt
offerings (_home_) to the gods, which is the finale of the religious
part of the rite.[31] But before the bridegroom leaves the place of
worship, the officiating priests of both sides must have their _dackina_
or pecuniary reward. If the boy be of the Mowleek caste and the girl of
the Koolin caste, the former must give double what the latter gives, _i.
e._, 16 Rupees and 8 Rupees. Here, as in every other instance, the
superiority of caste asserts its peculiar privileges. The professional
genealogists, after concluding their recitation and singing their
epithalamiums, also come in for their share of the reward, but they are
generally told to wait till the next day, when in common with other
Ghatacks they receive their recompense. The bridegroom is then permitted
to have a little breathing time, after having undergone the infliction
of so many religious and domestic rites, which latter formed the special
province of the females.
The head of the family now stands up before the assembly, and asks their
permission to go through the ceremony of _Mala Chandan_, or the
distribution of sandaled garlands. This is done to pay them the honor
due to their rank. The _Dullaputty_, or the head of the order or party,
almost invariably receives the first garland, and then the assembled
multitudes are served. For securing this hereditary distinction to a
family, large sums of money have been spent from time to time by
millionaires who, by the favorable combination of circumstances, had
risen from an obscure position in life to a state of great affluence.
The late Rajah Rajkissen Bahadoor, Baboos Ram Doolal Dey, Kisto Ram
Bose, Modun Mohun Dutt, Santi Ram Singh, Ram Rutton Roy and others,
expended upwards of a lakh of Rupees, or L10,000, each for the
possession of the enviable title of _Dullaputty_, or head of a party.
The way by which this noble distinction was secured was to induce
first-class Koolins, by sufficient pecuniary inducements, to intermarry
into the families of the would-be _Dullaputty_. The generally
impoverished condition of the old aristocracy of the land, and the
onward march of intellect teaching the people to look to sterling merit
for superiority in the scale of Society have considerably deteriorated
the value of these artificial distinctions. The progress of education
has opened a new era in the social institutions of the country, and an
enlightened proletariat is now-a-days more esteemed than an empty
titled _Dullaputty_, the magnitude of whose social status is not to be
estimated by the numbers of Koolins he is connected with, but by the
extent and character of his services to society.
The bridegroom next dines with his friends outside, notwithstanding the
importunities of the females for him to dine in their presence in the
inner apartment, that they might have an opportunity to indulge in
merriment at his expense. As a rule, the Brahmins dine first, and then
the numerous guests and attendants, numbering sometimes one thousand.
Despite the precaution of the friends of the bride to prevent unwelcome
intrusion, from a natural apprehension of running short of supplies,
which, on such occasions, are procured at enormous cost, many uninvited
persons in the disguise of respectable looking Baboos contrive somehow
or other to mingle in the crowd and behave with such propriety as to
elude detection. The proportion of male intruders is larger than that of
female ones, simply because the latter, however barefaced, cannot
entirely divest themselves of all modesty. It would not be above the
mark to put down the number of the former at twenty per cent. Such men
are professional intruders; they are entirely devoid of a sense of self
respect, and lead a wretched, demoralized life. Foreigners can have no
idea of the extent to which they carry on their disreputable trade,
including in their ranks some of the highest Brahmins of the country. It
is not an uncommon sight, on such occasion, to behold numbers of people
depart after dinner with bundles of _loochees_ (fine edibles) and
sweetmeats in their hands, which _methranees_[32] threaten to touch and
defile.
When full justice has been done to the feast provided for the occasion,
the crowd melts away and streams out at the door, well pleased with the
reception they have had. It is much easier to satisfy men than women in
this respect. The latter are naturally fastidious, and the least
shortcoming is sure to be found fault with. When confusion and bustle
subside, the bridegroom is slowly conducted into a room in the inner
apartment which bears the euphonious name of _Basurghur_, the
bed-chamber of the happy pair, or rather the store-house of jokes and
banter, where are grouped together his wife, his mother-in-law,[33] and
the whole galaxy of beauty. The very name of _Basarghur_[34] suggests to
the female a variety of ideas at once amusing and fascinating. As I have
already observed, she, nursed from her cradle in a state of perfect
seclusion, and immersed in all the drudgeries of a monotonous domestic
life, is glad of any opportunity to share in the unreined pleasure of
joviality. The mother-in-law, throwing aside conventional restraint,
introduces herself, or is introduced by other women, to her son-in-law.
They pull the poor lad's ears, in spite of her earnest protestation, and
if they do not know what flirtation is, they assail him with jokes
which quite puzzle him and bewilder his senses. They burst into roars of
laughter and make themselves merry at his expense; he feels himself
almost helpless and unprepared to make a suitable repartee, and is at
length driven into all manner of excuses, as plausible reasons for a
brief respite and a short repose. He complains of headache occasioned by
the lateness of the hour; as a sure remedy they give him soda, ice,
eau-de-cologne, and almost bathe him in rose-water; but a soporific they
can on no account allow him, because it would mar their pleasure and
sink their lively spirits. Keeping up their jokes, they place the lovely
bride with all her gold trappings on his knee, and unveiling her face
ask him to look at it, and say whether or not he likes her; she closes
her eyes, moves and jerks to have the veil dropped down, but her sisters
yield not to her wish, and keeping her yet unveiled, repeat the
question. Of course he makes no reply, but blushes and hangs down his
head; their demand being imperative, he sees no other alternative, but
to gently reply in the affirmative. They next make the girl bride, much
against her inclination, lie down by his side; as often as she is
dragged so often she draws back, but yielding at last to the admonition
of her mother, she is constrained to lie down, because, on that night,
this form is strictly enjoined in the female shaster. The innocent girl,
unconscious of the absurd mirth, shrinking together, turns away, and
occasionally whimpering, passes the sleepless, miserable hours. The dawn
of morning is to her most welcome, although it affords her but a
temporary relief. As the first glimpse of light is perceived, she flies
into the bosom of her aunt, who tries to animate her drooping spirit by
a word or two of solace, citing perhaps at the same time the example of
Surrajiney, her elder sister, placed in a similar position three years
ago. The women referred to remain in the _Basarghur_. As a matter of
course aged women go to sleep faster than young sprightly girls of
sweet seventeen, who are bent on making the best of the occasion by
indulging in jokes and witticisms. They literally rack their brains to
outwit the bridegroom by their _thata_ and _tamasha_ (jokes), and their
stock of it seems to be almost inexhaustible. They contrive to make him
chew the same beera or betel which is _first_ chewed by the bride, and
if he be obstinate enough to refuse it, in obedience to the warning of
his mother, which is often the case, four or five young ladies open out
his lips, and thrust the chewed betel into his mouth. What young man
would be so ungallant as to resist them after all? He must either submit
or bear the opprobrium of a foolish discourteous boy. Thus the whole
night is passed in the banter and practical joking peculiar to the
idiosyncracy of the Hindoo females. When in the morning he attempts to
get away from their company, one or two ladies, notably his _salees_, or
sisters-in-law hold him fast by the skirt of his silk garment demanding
the customary present of _Sarjaytollanee_.[35] He sends a message to his
man outside, and gets thirty two or fifty Rupees, on payment of which
they are satisfied and permit him to go. After a short respite he is
again brought into the inner apartment, and after shaving, bathing and
changing his clothes, he is made to go almost through the same course of
female rites as he had to perform on the preceding night, with this
difference only, that no officiating priest is required to help on the
occasion. This rite is named _Bassi Bibaha_ (not new marriage), all the
ceremonials being conducted by the females. It would be tedious to
inflict on the reader a recapitulation of the same, but suffice it to
say, that in all the primary pervading principle is plainly perceptible,
namely, the long life and conjugal felicity of the happy pair. It is a
remarkable fact that in the opinion of the Hindoo females the wider the
circle of matrimonial ceremonies, the greater the chance of securing the
favor of Hymen. At the conclusion, the boy and girl are directed to say
that they have passed the state of celibacy and entered on that of
matrimony. "Marriage is honorable in all and the bed undefiled."
As morning advances, the bridegroom walking, and the bride in the arms
of her relative, are next brought into a room--the women blowing the
conch and sprinkling water,--and made to sit near each other. They then
play with cowries, (shells) the girl is told to take up _a few_ cowries
in her left hand and put them near the boy, while on the other hand the
boy is told to take up as _much_ as his right hand can contain and put
them before the girl, the meaning of which is, that the girl would spend
sparingly and the boy give her abundantly. They then play with four very
small earthen pots, called _mooglivhur_, filled with rice and peas; the
girl first opens the lids of the pots and throws the contents on a
_Koolo_, (winnowing fan) the boy takes it up and fills the pots, the
girl slowly puts the lids on and inaudibly repeats the name of her
husband for the first time,[36] expressing a hope that by the above
process she stops his mouth and curbs his tongue, that he may never
abuse her. As the first course of breakfast, fruits and sweetmeats are
served to the bridegroom and the bride. He eats a little and is
requested to offer a portion of the same to his wife, whose modesty
forbids her to accept any in his presence, but the earnest importunities
of the nearest of kin overcome her shyness, and she is at length
prevailed upon to taste a little which is offered her by the hand of her
husband, the females expressing a desire at the same time that she may
continue to eat from the same hand to the end of her days. They then
receive the benedictions of the male and female members of the family in
money, dooav grass and paddy, which embody a prayer to the God for her
everlasting happiness. A second course of breakfast consisting of boiled
rice, dhall, fish and vegetable curries in great variety, sweetmeats,
sour and sweet milk is next brought for the bridegroom; seeing that he
eats very slowly and scantily through shame, his sisters-in-law help him
with handfuls of rice and curries, &c. After he has finished eating, the
residue of the victuals is given to his wife in a separate room, because
it is customary that she should use the same that day, with a view to
cement mutual love and affection.
Preparations are now being made for the return of the procession to the
house of the bridegroom, but before it starts some pecuniary matters are
to be settled. The father of the bridegroom gives fifty Rupees as
_Sarjaytollanee_ for the benefit of the sisters of the bride, and the
father of the bride must give the same sum, if not a larger one, as
_Nanadkhaymee_ for the benefit of the sisters of the bridegroom. Then
the difficult problem of _Samajeek_ is to be solved. In almost every
case, the question is not decided without some discussion. Hindoos are
above all tenacious of caste when the question is one of Rupees and
pice. Crowds of _Bhats_, _fakeers_, _nagas_, _raywos_, and mendicants
shouting at times "_Jay, Jay_," victory, victory; "Bar, konay bachay
thakoog," may the bridegroom and bride live long, impatiently wait in
the street for their usual alms. They get a few annas each and disperse.
Professional _Ghatucks_, genealogists and Brahmins also come in for
their share and are not disappointed. Then comes the interesting and
affecting part of the ceremonial, the _jattra_, or the approaching
departure of the happy pair for the house of the bridegroom. A small
brass pot filled with holy water and a small wooden pot of vermillion
being placed before them, they are made to sit on the two wooden
_pirays_ on which they sat the previous evening at the time of marriage,
and the females touch their foreheads with sour milk, _shiddi_ (hemp),
and the consecrated _urghi_ of the goddess Doorga,[37] which latter is
kept in a tuft on the _Khopa_ or ringlet of the bride's hair for eight
days. Her forehead is also rubbed with vermillion, the emblem of a
female whose husband is alive. This is followed by the rite of
_Kanokanjooley_ already described, but this time the father of the bride
throws the brass plate right over her head into the cloth of his wife,
who stands for the purpose behind her daughter. A sudden and solemn
pause is perceptible here, betokening the subsidence of joy and the
advent of sorrow. In the midst of the company, mostly females, the
father and mother of the bride, alternately clasping both the hands of
the bridegroom, with tears in their eyes, commit the very responsible
trust of the young wife to his charge, saying at the same time in a
faltering tone, among other things, that "hitherto our daughter was
placed under our care, but now through the _Bhabiturbee_ or kind
dispensation of Providence, she is consigned for ever to your charge,
may you kindly overlook her shortcomings and frailties and prove your
fidelity by constancy." At this parting expression, tears start into the
eyes of all the females who are naturally more susceptible than the
sterner sex. With sorrowful countenances and deep emotion they look
steadfastly at the married pair and imploringly beseech the bridegroom
to treat the bride with all the tenderness of an affectionate husband.
The scene is exceedingly affecting, and the sweet sorrow of parting does
not permit him to say _Bidaya_ or farewell to the bridegroom. The
mother-in-law, especially, should the bride be her only daughter, is
overwhelmed with grief, and if she does not cry bitterly, her suppressed
emotion is unmistakable; the idea even of a temporary separation is
enough to break her heart, and no consolation can restore the natural
serenity of her mind.[38] Her relatives endeavour to cheer her by
reminding her of their and her own cases, and declare that all females
are born to share the same fate. They scarcely enter the world before
they must leave their parents and intermarry into other families. This
is their destiny, and this the law of _Juggut_ (the world), and they
must all abide by it. Instead of repining, she ought to pray to _Debta_
(god,) "that her daughter should ever continue to live at her
father-in-law's, use _Sidoor_ (vermillion) on her grey head, wear out
her _iron bangle_, and be a _junma ayestri_," blessings which are all
enjoyed by a female whose husband is alive. Such powerful arguments and
undeniable examples partially restore the equanimity of her mind, and
she is half persuaded to join her friends and go and see the procession
from the top of the house. The same tumult and bustle which ensued at
the time of coming now prevail at the departure of the bridegroom in
his _Sookasun_, and the bride in her closely covered crimson _Mohapaya_,
preceded by all the _tinsel trappings_ and bands of English and Native
musicians. The procession slowly moves forward with all the pomp and
consequence of a grand, imposing exhibition, amidst the staring of the
wondering populace and of the sight-seeing public. "It is on such
occasions," as Macaulay observes, "that tender and delicate women, whose
veils had never been lifted before the public gaze, came forth from the
inner chambers in which Eastern jealousy keeps watch over their beauty."
The great body of _Barjattars_--bridegroom's friends--who graced the
procession with their presence the previous night, do not accompany it
now on its return homewards, and notwithstanding all the vigilance of
the extra guards, the mob scrambles and forcibly takes away the tinsel
flower and fruit trees on the way. In an hour or two, all the objects of
wonder vanish from the sight, and leave no mark behind them: "the gaze
of fools, the pageant of a day."
On the arrival of the procession at its destination, the bridegroom
alights from the _Sookasun_ and the bride from the _Mohapaya_, under
which, by way of welcome, is thrown a _ghara_, or pot of water. Hereupon
the silk _chadur_ or scarf of the bridegroom, so long in the possession
of the bride, being entwined between both while the conch is blowing,
they are taken into the inner apartment, the former walking, the latter
in the arms of one of her nearest female relatives whose husband is
alive. The boy is made to stand on an _allpana piray_ (white-painted
wooden seat), the girl on a thala or metal plate filled with milk and
altawater, and holding in her hand a live _shole_ fish. A small earthen
pot of milk is put upon the fire by a female whose husband is alive, and
when through heat it overflows, the veil of the girl being lifted, she
is desired to witness the overflowing process and say gently three
times, "may the wealth and resources of her father-in-law overflow,"
while her mother-in-law puts round her left hand an iron bangle,[39] and
with the usual benediction that she may be ever blessed with her
husband, rubs the middle of her forehead with a little vermillion. A
small basket of paddy or unhusked rice, over which stands a small pot of
vermillion, is placed on the head of the bride, which the bridegroom
holds with his left hand, and when they are both greeted three times
with the _Sree_, _Barandala Koolo_, water, plantain, betel and
betel-nuts, as has been described before, by the bridegroom's mother,
he, with his pair of nut-crackers in his right hand, throws over the
ground a few grains of paddy from the _reck_, walks slowly over a new
piece of red bordered cloth into a room, accompanied by his wife and
preceded by other females, one of whom blows a conch and another
sprinkles water,--both tokens of an auspicious event.
When all are properly seated upon bedding spread on the floor, the
bridegroom and the bride play again the game of _jatook_ with cowries
(shells)[40] as before. They afterwards receive the usual _asseerbad_
(blessing) in paddy, doov-grass and money. The mother-in-law in order to
ensure the permanent submissiveness of the bride puts honey into her
ears and sugar into her mouth that she may receive her commands and
execute them like a sweet obedient girl. Some females then, placing a
male child on the thigh of the bridegroom, desire him to hand it to the
bride. According to prescribed custom, the mother-in-law, on first
seeing the face of her daughter-in-law, presents her with a pair of gold
bangles. Other near female relatives, following her example, present her
severally with a pair of gold armlets, a pearl necklace, a set of gold
_pitjhapa_, or an ornament for the back, jingling as the girl moves, a
pair of diamond cut gold ear-rings set in precious stones, and so on. To
account for the common desire of the Hindoos to give a profusion of
jewels to their females, Menu, their great fountain of authority,
enjoins "let women be constantly supplied with ornaments at festivals
and jubilees, for if the wife be not elegantly attired, she will not
exhilarate her husband. A wife gaily adorned, the whole house is
embellished."
She is next taken into the kitchen, where all sorts of cooked victuals,
except meat, are prepared in great abundance. She is desired to look at
them and pray to God that her father-in-law may always enjoy plenty.
Returning from the cookroom, the bridegroom gives into her hands an
embroidered Benares _saree_ as also a brass _thala_, (plate) with a few
_batees_ (cups) containing boiled rice, _dhall_, and all the prepared
curries, vegetables, and fish, frumenty, &c., and addresses her,
declaring that from this day forward he undertakes to support her with
food and clothes. He then partakes of the dinner and retires, while the
bride is made to share the residue.[41] She is thus taught, from the
moment of her union at the Hymeneal altar, her fundamental duty of
absolute submission to, and utter dependence on, her husband. Should she
be of dark complexion and her features not beautiful, the bridegroom is
thus twitted by his elder brothers' wives: "you all along disliked a
_kalo_ (black) girl, now what will you do, _thacoorpo_? Surely you
cannot forsake her, we will see by-and-bye you shall have to wash her
feet." Words like these pierce the heart of the bridegroom, but
politeness forbids him to reply. As regards the power of woman, the same
lawgiver says--"a female is able to draw from the right path in this
life, not a fool only, but even a sage, and can lead him in subjection
to desire or to wrath."
The nearest relatives and friends of the family are invited to partake
of the _Bowbhat_ or bridal dinner consisting of boiled rice, dhall, fish
and vegetable curries, frumenty, _polowya_, &c., served to the guests by
the bride's own hands, which is tantamount to her recognition as one of
the members of the family. To eat _unna_ (boiled rice) is one thing and
to eat _jalpan_ (loochees and sweetmeats) is quite another. A Hindoo can
take the latter at the house of one of inferior caste, but he would lose
his caste if he were to eat the former at the same place. Even among
equals of the same caste, and much more among inferiors, boiled rice is
not taken without mature consideration, and some sort of compensation
from the inferior to the superior for condescending to eat the same. The
compensation is made in money and clothes according to the rank of the
_Koolins_. Before departing, the guests invited to the _Bowbhat_ at
which they eat boiled _rice_ from the hands of the bride, give her one,
two, or more Rupees each.
The day following is a very interesting day or rather night, being the
night of _Foolsajya_[42] or flowery bed. At about eight o'clock in the
evening the father of the bride sends to his son-in-law ample presents
of all sorts of fruits in or out of season, home and bazar made
sweetmeats, some in the shape of men, women, fishes, birds, carriages,
horses, elephants, &c., &c., each weighing from 6 to 10 lbs., sweet and
sour milk (_batasa_,) a kind of sweet cakes, _chineere moorkey_, paddy,
fried and sugared comfits, spices of all sorts, betel and prepared
betel-nuts, sets of ornaments and toys made of cutch, representing
railway carriages, gardens, house, dancing girls, &c., imitation pearl
necklaces made of rice, imitation gold necklace made of paddy, colored
imitation fruits made of curd[43], butter, sugar, sugar-candy, _chana_
(coagulated milk), otto of rose, rose-water, chaplets of flowers and
flower ornaments, in great variety, Dacca and embroidered Benares
_dhooty_ and _saree_ for the boy and the girl, clothes for all the
elderly females, couch-cot, beddings, sets of silver and brass utensils,
carpet, embroidered shoes, gold watch and chain, &c., &c. Between 125
and 150 servants, male and female, carry these articles, some in banghy,
some in baskets, and some in large brass _thalas_ or trays. These
presents being properly arranged in the _Thacoor-dallan_ the male
friends of the family are invited to come down and see them, some
praising the choice assortment and large variety, as well as the taste
of the father of the bride, while others more calculating make an
estimate as to the probable cost of the whole. These articles are then
removed into the inner apartment, where the females, naturally
loquacious, criticise them according to their judgment; the simple and
the good-natured say they are good and satisfactory, others more
fastidious find fault with them. They are, however, soon silenced by the
prudent remarks of the adult male members of the family. The servants
are next fed and dismissed with presents of money, some receiving one
Rupee each being the servants of the bride's family, some half a Rupee
being the servants of other families. They then take back all the brass
_thalas_ and trays, leaving the baskets behind.
Here we come to the climax of interest. The bridegroom and the bride,
adorned with a wealth of flower wreaths, and dressed in red-bordered
Dacca clothes, with sandal paste on their foreheads, and sitting side by
side in the presence of females whose husbands are alive, are desired to
eat even a small portion of the articles of food that have been
presented, and what is the most interesting feature in the scene, is
that the former helps the latter and the latter helps the former, both
throwing aside for the first time the restraint which modesty naturally
imposes on such an occasion. To be more explicit, the boy eats one half
of a sweetmeat and gives the other half to the girl, and the girl in her
turn is constrained to follow the same example, though with a blushing
countenance and a veiled face. Female modesty predominates in this
isolated instance. If the boy give blushingly, the girl gives shyly and
tremulously; in spite of her best efforts, she cannot consistently make
up her mind to lift up her right hand and stretch it towards the mouth
of her husband, but is after all helped to do so by a woman, whose
husband is alive. This process of eating[44] and mutual help, when three
days have scarcely passed over their heads, naturally gives rise to joy,
merriment and laughter among the females; and one amongst them exclaims;
"look, look, _Soudaminey_, how our new _Radha_ and _Krishna_ are sitting
side by side and eating together; may they live long and sport thus."
The mother of the boy watches the progress of the interesting scene,
and in transports of joy wishes for their continued felicity. The young
and sprightly, who have once passed through the same process, and whose
hearts are enlivened by the reminiscences of past occurrences, too
recent to be forgotten, tarry in the room to the last moment, till sleep
weighing down the eyelids of the happy pair, the mother of the
bridegroom gently calls them aside, and leaves them to rest undisturbed.
In accordance with the old established custom, their bed is strewn with
flowers and their bodies perfumed with otto of rose. This is not enough
for the sprightly ladies, the complement of whose amusement and
merriment is not yet full. Even if the night be a chilly one, regardless
of the effects of exposure, they must _aripato_, or jealously watch
through the crevices of windows, whether or not the boy talks to the
girl, and if he do, what is the nature of the talk. Thus they pass the
whole night prying and laughing, chatting with each other on subjects
suited to their taste and mode of thought. When morning dawns, the boy
opening the door goes outside, and the girl slowly walks to her
maid-servants, who accompanied her from her father's house. Her whole
desire is to get back to her mother and sisters; nothing can reconcile
her to her new home; novelty has no charms for her except in her
paternal domicile. She repeatedly asks her maid-servants as to when the
_Palkee_ will come, and what is the time fixed for her _jattra_,
(departure); the maid-servants, consoling her, induce her to wash her
mouth and break her fast with a few sweetmeats. In obedience to the kind
instruction of her mother, she sits closely veiled and talks little, if
at all, even to young girls of her tender age. She next takes her
_vojan_, or dinner, and to while away time, little girls try to amuse
her with toys or a game at cards; at length the time comes for the
toilet work, and the arrival of the covered _Mohapaya_ is announced. She
again takes a few sweetmeats, and making a _pronam_ (bow) to all her
superiors, is helped into the Palkee by her mother-in-law, a female
having previously washed her feet. The usual benediction on such an
occasion is, "may you continue to live under the roof of your
father-in-law in the enjoyment of conjugal bliss."
On the arrival of the Mahapaya at her father's house, almost all the
females come out for a moment, taking care previously to have the suddur
door bolted and the Palkee bearers removed. They cheerfully welcome the
return of the girl home. Her mother, unveiling her face and taking her
in her arms, thus affectionately addresses her, "my _Bacha_, (child) my
_sonarchand_ (golden moon) where have you been? Did not your heart mourn
for us?" Our house looked _khakha_ (desolate) in your absence. "What did
they (bridegroom's family) say about our _dayway thowya_ (presents)? Did
they express any _nindya_, (dissatisfaction)? How have the women behaved
towards you? How are your _sassooree_ and _sasoor_ (mother-in-law and
father-in-law,)?" Thus interrogating, they all walk inside and, making
the girl change her silk clothes and sit near them, begin to examine and
criticise the ornaments given her by her father-in-law. "Let us see the
pearl necklace _first_," says Bhoopada? "The pearls are not smooth and
round, what may be its value?" _Geeri Balla_, taking her own pearl
necklace from off her neck, compares the one with the other. They
unanimously pronounce the latter to be more costly than the former; be
that as it may, its value cannot be less than Rupees 500. They next take
in hand the _pitjapa_, ornament for the back, looking at it for a few
minutes they pass their opinion, saying it is heavier and better made
than that of _Geeri Balla_. The _Sita haur_, or _Jarawya_[45] (gold
necklace) afterwards attracts their attention, and they roughly estimate
its price at Rupees 350. It is not a little surprising that though these
women are never permitted to go beyond the precincts of the zenana, yet
their valuation of ornaments, unless it be a _jarawya bijoutry_ of
enormous cost, such as is worn on grand occasions by the wife of a "_big
swell_," often bears the nearest approximation to the intrinsic worth of
an article. Thus almost every ornament, one after another, forms the
subject of their criticism. When their discussion is over, the girl is
desired to take the greater portion of her ornaments off her body--save
a pair of gold _balla_[46] on her hands and a necklace on her neck--and
leave them to the care of her mother. She then mixes in the company of
other little girls of her tender age, some married, some unmarried; who
curiously ask her all about her new friends, until their talk resumes
its usual childish topics. She passes the day among them very
pleasantly, so much so that when her mother calls her to take her
luncheon, she stays back and says only "_jachee, jachee_," (coming,
coming,) her mind being so much absorbed in her juvenile sports.
The next day is again a day of trial for her, she has to go for
_gharbasath_[47] to her father-in-law's house. On awaking, she remembers
where she will have to go in course of the day; a sensation bordering on
sulkiness almost unconsciously steals upon her, and as time passes it
increases in intensity. About four in the afternoon the arrival of the
_Mahapaya_ is announced, her sister combs her hair and adorns her
person with all the ornaments she has lately received. Dressed in her
bridal silk _saree_, her eyes seem charged with tears, and symptoms of
reluctance are visible in every step; but go she must; no alternative is
left her. So her mother helps her into the _Mahapaya_ and orders a
durwan and two maid-servants to accompany her, not forgetting to assure
her that she is to be brought back the next day. Despite this assurance,
she whimpers and weeps, and is consoled on the way by her maid-servants.
At her father-in-law's, young girls of her age being impatient to
receive her, are seen moving backwards and forwards to get a glimpse of
the _Mahapaya_, the arrival of which is a signal for almost all the
ladies to come out and greet the object of their affection. Her
mother-in-law steps forward, and taking up the girl in her arms walks
inside, followed by a train of other ladies, whose hearts are
exhilarated again at the prospect of merriment at the expense of the
married pair. When the time comes round for them to retire, the same
scene of _arepata_ is re-enacted by the mirth-loving ladies, with all
their "quips and cranks and wanton wiles." At day-break, the girl, as
must naturally be expected, quietly walks to her confidential
maid-servant, and whispers her to go and tell her mother to send the
_Mahapaya_ Palkee as early as possible. Bearing her message, one of them
goes for the purpose but the mother replies, How can she send the Palkee
except at the lucky hour after dinner? When this reply is communicated
to the girl, she sits sulkily aloof, until her mother-in-law cajoles her
and offers for her breakfast a few sweetmeats with milk. After a great
deal of hesitation she complies with her request, which, to be
effective, is always accompanied by a threat of not allowing her to
return to her father's in the event of a refusal. About ten o'clock she
takes her regular breakfast as described before, but she does not eat
with zest, for whatever delicacy may be offered her, it palls upon her
taste; continually brooding on the idea of a return home. This is the
day when the bridegroom and the bride untie from each other's hand the
yellow home-spun _charka_ thread with which they were entwined on the
day of marriage, as a mark of their indissoluble union. At length the
lucky hour arrives, and with it the _Mahapaya_ comes. The very
announcement of the fact revives the drooping spirits of the bride.
After going through the usual toilet work and a slight repast, she gets
into the covered conveyance, assisted by her mother-in-law and other
ladies. When she returns home, she changes her bridal silk garment and
strips herself of the greater portion of her ornaments. Now uncontrolled
and unreserved, she breathes a free, genial, atmosphere; her mother and
sisters welcome her with their heartfelt congratulations, and she moves
about with her wonted buoyancy of spirit. Throwing aside her sulkiness,
she commingles readily in conversation with all around her. She praises
the amiable qualities of her father-in-law and mother-in-law, and the
very kind treatment she has had while under their roof, but she keeps
her reserve when even the slightest allusion is made to her husband,
because this is to her young mind forbidden ground on which she cannot
venture to tread without violating the sacred rules of conventionalism.
At the marriages of rich families, as will be understood from our
description, vast sums of money are expended. The greatest expense is
incurred in purchasing jewels and making presents of brass utensils,
shawls, clothes, sweetmeats, &c., to Brahmins, Koolins, _Ghatacks_ and
numerous friends, relatives and acquaintances, besides illuminations,
fireworks and all the pageantry of a pompous procession. In and about
Calcutta, the Rajahs of Shobabazar, the Dey family, the Mullick family,
the Tagore family, the Dutt family, the Ghosal family, and others, are
reported to have spent from fifty thousand rupees to two lakhs (L5,000
to L20,000) and upwards in the marriages of their sons. Whilst writing
this I am told Maharajah Jotendro Mohun Tagore is said to have expended
about two lakhs of rupees in the marriage of his nephew. The most
interesting feature in the extraordinary munificence of the Moharajah
is, as I have learnt, his princely contribution to the "District
Charitable Society,"--an act of benevolence which has shewn, in a very
conspicuous manner, not only his good sense, but his warm sympathy with
the cause of suffering humanity. It were to be wished that his noble
example would exercise some influence on other Hindoo millionaires. If a
tithe of such marriage expenses were devoted to Public Charity, the poor
and helpless would ceaselessly chant the names of such donors, and the
reward would be something better than the transient admiration of the
idle populace.
For one or two years after marriage, the girl generally remains under
the paternal roof, occasionally paying a visit to her father-in-law's as
need be. As she advances in years, her repugnance--the effect of early
marriage--to live with her husband is gradually overcome, till time and
circumstances completely reconcile her to her future home. Her affection
grows, and she learns to appreciate the grave meaning of a married life.
She is still, however, but a girl, in habit and ideas, when the real
union of wedded life or the second marriage takes place, which is
solemnised when she arrives at the age of puberty, say at her twelfth or
thirteenth year. There is a popular belief, whether erroneous or not it
is not for me to decide, that in this country heat accelerates growth,
and hence the Hindoo Shasturs enjoin the necessity of early marriage,
the injurious consequences of which are chiefly seen in the weak
constitution of the offspring, and the premature decay of the mother.
So abominable are some of the ceremonies connected with this event in
the life of a female that to describe them fully would be an outrage on
common decency.[48] I will, therefore, confine myself to a description
of the ceremonies, entirely abstaining from an allusion to the
abominations connected therewith. A general depravity of manners can
only account for the prevalence of this obnoxious institution, in the
eradication of which every Hindoo whose moral sense is not entirely
blunted ought to co-operate. As the delay of the union is in the belief
of a Hindoo an unpardonable sin, the fact referred to is announced by
the sound of a conch, and the bodies of all the females are smeared with
turmeric water,--an unmistakable evidence of joy. The news is also
conveyed to the nearest relatives by the family barber who receives
presents of clothes and money. It is quite evident from the silence of
the Hindoo Shastur on the subject that the origin of the female rites is
comparatively recent. Irrespective of the religious observances, it
affords an opportunity to the zenana females to indulge in obscene
depravities, the outcome of vitiated feeling.
The poor girl is placed on this occasion in the corner of a dark, dingy
room, with a small round pebble before her, shut out from the gaze of
men, and surrounded on four sides by four pieces of slender split
bamboos about one yard long fastened by a piece of thread. This is
called the _teerghur_ mentioned before. Being regarded as unclean, she
remains in this room for four days without a bedding or a musquito
curtain, and no one touches her, not even her sisters. She is forbidden
to see the sun, her diet is confined to boiled rice, milk, sugar, curd,
and tamarind without salt. On the morning of the fifth day, she is taken
to a neighbouring tank, accompanied by five women whose husbands are
alive. Smeared with turmeric water, they all bathe and return home,
throwing away the mat and other things that were in the room. She then
sits in another room, and a very low caste woman, in the presence of
five other respectable females (not widows), performs a series of what
is vulgarly called _Nith Kith_,[49] purely female rites, which are
exceedingly indecent and immoral, so much so that a woman who has any
sense of shame feels quite disgusted. During the day, according to
previous invitations, numerous female guests assemble and partake of a
good dinner provided for the occasion. They are also entertained with
songs, dancing and music, all done by professional females. When the
guests retire, they congratulate the girl with the usual benediction to
the effect,--"may you be blessed with a male child."
After a day or two the religious part of the ceremony is performed,
which is free from obscenity. On this occasion, the officiating priest
reading, and the bridegroom repeating the service after him, presents
offerings of rice, sweetmeats, plantain, clothes, doov-grass, fruits and
flowers to the following gods and goddesses, _viz._, _Shasthi_,
_Marcando_, _Soorja_, _Soobhachini_, _Gannesh_, and the nine planets,
much in the same way as when the nuptial rites were formally solemnized.
After this the hands of the bridegroom and the bride are joined
together, and the priest repeating certain formulas, the bridegroom then
causes a ring to slide between the bride's silk garment and her waist.
Twenty-one small images (twenty male and one female) made of pounded
rice are placed before the happy pair, and the priest feeds the bride
with sugar, clarified butter, milk, and the urine and dung of a calf to
ensure the purity of the offspring. They then partake of a good dinner,
the bride taking the residue of the bridegroom's meal. The twenty-one
images are put into the room of the pair as a token of happy offspring,
and the proportion of the males to the females, shews the premium and
discount at which they are respectively held. The bride now takes up her
permanent residence in the house of her father-in-law and becomes one of
his family.
For one twelve month after the marriage, the parents of the bridegroom
and the bride have to make exchanges of suitable presents to one another
at all the grand festivals. At the _first tatto_ or present, besides
clothes, heaps of fruits, sweetmeats, English toys and sundries, the
father of the youth gives one complete set of miniature silver and brass
utensils to the girl, while in return the father of the girl sends such
presents as a table, chair, writing desk, silver inkstand, gold and
silver pencil cases, stationery, perfumery, &c., in addition to an
equally large quantity of choice eatables of all kinds too numerous to
be detailed. The most expensive presents are two, namely, the _sittory_
or winter present and the Doorga Poojah present, the former requiring a
Cashmere shawl, _choga_ and sundry other articles of use, and the
latter, fine Dacca and silk clothes to the whole family, including men,
women and children.
It is a lamentable fact that though a Hindoo bears a great love and
affection to his wife while she lives, yet in the event of her death,
the effects of these amiable qualities are too soon effaced by the
strong influence of a new passion, and another union is very speedily
formed. Even during the period of his mourning, which lasts one month,
proposals for a second marriage are entertained, if not by the husband
himself, by his father or elder brother. When the remembrance of this
heavy domestic bereavement is so very fresh in the memory, it is highly
unbecoming and ungenerous to open or enter into a matrimonial
negotiation, and have it consummated immediately after the _asuchi_ or
mourning is over. A wife is certainly not a beast of burden that is no
sooner removed by death than it may be replaced by another. She is a
being whose joy and sorrow, happiness and misery, should be identical
with her husband's, and he is a savage in the widest sense of the word
who does not cherish a sacred regard for her memory after her death. In
regard to the whole conduct and relations of the married life, Hindoos
cannot have the golden rule too strongly impressed: "Let every one of
you in particular so love his wife, even as himself; and let the wife
see that she reverence her husband."
FOOTNOTES:
[15] I may be permitted here to observe _en passant_ that a civilized
nation in describing the beauty of a woman, is sometimes apt to adopt
the flowery language of Hafiz. At a Ministerial banquet sometime ago,
the Lord Mayor of London was reported to have said about the Princess of
Wales; "she is perfection, she sparkles like a gem of fifty facets, she
is light when she smiles and she is beauty whenever you see her."
[16] Presents of sweetmeats, fruits, clothes, flowers and sundry other
articles on a pretty grand scale from the bride to the bridegroom, which
will be described more in detail afterwards.
[17] A Rajpoot prince was said to have given a lakh of Rupees to a bard
in order to purchase his rhythmic plaudits in a respectable assemblage
of his countrymen.
[18] If we consult properly the pages of the history of this country
from the earliest period, we shall find abundant proofs of the very
great influence of women on Hindoo society in general. I cannot do
better than give the following quotation from Tod's Annals of Rajasthan.
"What led to the wars of Rama? The rape of Sita. What rendered deadly
the feuds of the Yadus? The insult of Dropadi. What made prince Nala an
exile from Nirwar? His love for Damayanti. What made Raja Bharti abandon
the throne of Avanti? The loss of Pingala. What subjected the Hindu to
the dominion of the Islamite? The rape of the princess of Canouj. In
fine, the cause which overturned kingdoms, commuted the sceptre to the
pilgrim's staff and formed the ground-work of all their grand epics, is
woman."
[19] Besides the marriage expenses, this man gave to his five
sons-in-law fifty thousand Rupees each, as well as a house worth ten
thousand Rupees more.
[20] A thin stuff like paper with which Hindoo females redden their
feet. A widow is not allowed to use it. In the absence of shoes, which
they are forbidden to wear, this red color heightens the beauty of their
tiny feet. It is applied once a week.
[21] In the selection of a bridegroom, outward appearances are not
always to be trusted. The late Baboo Aushotosh Dey, a millionaire, had a
very beautiful grand-daughter to give in marriage. As was to be
expected, _Ghatacks_ and _Ghatkees_ had been rummaging the whole town
and its suburbs for a suitable match, one who would possess all the
recommendations of a good education, a respectable family, and a fair,
prepossessing appearance--qualities which are rarely combined in one.
Among others, the name of the late Honorable Baboo Dwarkey Nauth Mitter
(afterwards a Judge of the Calcutta High Court,) was mentioned. He was
then a bachelor, and his reputation as a scholar spread far and wide.
Somehow or other he was brought into the house of Baboo Aushotosh Dey
for the purpose of giving the ladies an opportunity of seeing him. His
scholastic attainments were pronounced to be of very superior order, but
not being blessed with a prepossessing appearance, he was rejected.
[22] In Hindoo marriages and other ceremonies of a similar nature _red_
color is indispensably necessary for all kinds of wearing apparel, even
the invitation cards must be on _red_ paper. Red color is the sign of
joy and gaiety as opposed to black, which is held to be ominous.
[23] A collirium case which contains the black dye with which native
females daub their own and their childrens' eyelids.
[24] The Bengalis have become so much anglicised of late that they have
not hesitated to give an English name to their sweetmeats. When the late
Lord Canning was the Governor General of India, it was said his Baboo
made a present of some native sweetmeats to Lady Canning, who was kindly
pleased to accept it. Hence the sweetmeat is called "Lady Canning," and
to this day no grand feast among the Bengalis is considered as complete
unless the "Lady Canning" sort is offered to the guests. The man that
first made it is said to have gained much money by its sale. It is not
the savoury taste of the thing that makes it so popular, but the name of
the illustrious Lady. While treating the subject of Hindoo
entertainment, it would not be out of place to make a few observations
on a branch of it, for the information of European readers. At all
public entertainments of the kind I am referring to, respectable Hindoos
strictly confine themselves to _vegetable curries_. Though those of the
_Sakto_ denomination (the followers of Kali and Doorga) have no
religious scruples to use goat-meat (male) and onion in the shape of
curry among select friends at home, they dare not expose themselves by
offering it to strangers. Hence, in large assemblies, they strictly
confine themselves to vegetable curries of different kinds. The
principle is good, were it honestly observed; because meat, if not
necessarily, yet generally, is the concomitant of _drink_. _Privately_,
however, both meat and drink are largely used. Respectable females are
entirely free as yet from these carnal indulgences.
[25] The cause of the fear is as follows: When Kartick (the god of
beauty and the son of the goddess Doorga) went out to marry, he had
forgotten to take with him the usual pair of nut-crackers. When he
remembered this on the way, he immediately returned home, and to his
great surprise, saw his mother eating with her ten hands, she being a
ten handed goddess. On asking the reason, he was told that it was lest,
when he should bring his wife, she would not give her the proper
quantity of food. Under what strange hallucinations, even the gods and
goddesses of the Hindoos laboured!
[26] The _chamurs_ are fans made of the tails of Thibet cows.
[27] Every commonplace minutiae in the domestic economy of a Hindoo
family is fraught with meaning: the nuts are kept all-day in the bride's
mouth and are saturated with her saliva. When cut by the hand of the
bridegroom they are supposed to possess a peculiar virtue. Somehow or
other, the bridegroom must be made to use them with the betel, in spite
of the warning of his mother, forbidding him to use them on any account.
When used, his love for his wife is supposed to be intensified, which is
prejudicial to the interests of his mother.
[28] The articles consist of Silver Ghara, Gharoo, Batha, Thalla, Batti,
Glass, Raykab, Dahur, Dipay and Pickdan.
[29] I have known a young collegian of a rather humourous disposition
bleat like a lamb at the time of marriage, to the great amusement of all
the females, except his mother-in-law, who, simple as she was, took the
matter in a serious light, and felt herself almost dejected on account
of the great stupidity of her son-in-law (for she could not take it in
any other sense), but her dejection gave place to joy when in the
_Basurghur_--the sleeping room of the happy pair for the night--she
heard him outwit all the females present. It is obvious that the meaning
of this part of the female rite is to render the husband tame and docile
as a lamb, especially in his treatment of his wife.
[30] In former days when education was but very scantily cultivated,
unpleasant quarrels were known to have arisen between the two parties
from very trivial circumstances. The friends of the bridegroom, often
pluming themselves on their special prerogatives as members of the
strong party readily resented even the slightest insult offered them
rather incautiously by the bridal party. These altercations sometimes
terminated in blows, if not in lacerated limbs. Instead of waiting till
the conclusion of the ceremony, the whole of the bridegroom's party has
been known to return home without dinner, to the great mortification of
the other party. There is a common saying among the Bengalees that "he
who is the enemy of the house should go to a marriage party." It was a
common sport with the friends of the bridegroom to cut with a pair of
scissors the bedding at the house of the bride. But happily such
practices are of rare occurrence now-a-days.
[31] An English gentleman, who, to a versatile genius, combined an
intelligent knowledge of, and a familiar acquaintance with, the manners
and customs of the country, once advised a Native friend of his to go to
England and other great countries on the continent with a number of
Hindoo females and exhibit there all the important social and domestic
ceremonials of this country in a place of public resort. The very
circumstance of Hindoo females performing those rites in the manner in
which they are popularly celebrated here, would be sure to attract a
very large audience. The marriage ceremonies alone would form a regular
night of enchantment and amusement. The time will certainly come when
the realization of such an ingenious idea would no longer be held
Utopian.
[32] Sweeper-caste females.
[33] According to the prescribed rules of the Hindoo society, a
mother-in-law is not permitted to appear before her son-in-law; it is
not only considered indecorous, but is associated with something else
that is scandalous; hence she always keeps her distance from her
son-in-law, but on this particular night, her presence in the room with
other females is quite consistent with feminine propriety. In the case
of a very young son-in-law, however, a departure from this rule is not
reprehensible.
[34] In the suburbs and rural districts of Bengal, females, more
particularly among the Brahmin class, are tacitly allowed to have so
much liberty on this special occasion that they, putting under the
bushel their instinctive modesty, entertain the bridegroom not only with
epithalamiums but with other amorous songs, having reference to the
diversions of Krishna with his mistress, and the numerous milk-maids.
Under an erroneous impression of singing holy songs they unwittingly
trumpet the profligate character of their god. These songs are generally
known by the names of _sakhisungbad_ and _biraha_; the former as the
designation implies, consist of news as conveyed by the principal
milk-maids regarding his mistress, to whom he oftentimes proved false,
and the latter of disappointed love, which broadly exhibits the
prominent features of his sensuous life. They feel such an interest in
these low entertainments, that under the hallowed name of religion they
are led to indirectly perpetrate a crime. Frail as women naturally are,
the example of such a god, combined with the sanction of religion, has
undoubtedly a tendency to impair the moral influence of a virtuous life.
I have always regretted this from my personal observation, but to strike
a death blow at the root of the evil must be the work of ages. The
essential elements of the Hindoo character must be thoroughly recast.
[35] The fee for the trouble of removing the bed and keeping up the
night, the ladies who remained in the bed-chamber are justly entitled to
it for their pains; a widow, be it observed, is not permitted to touch
the bed lest her misfortune would befall the bride, but she gets,
however, her portion or share of the fee.
[36] It should be mentioned that a female after her marriage is not
allowed to utter the name of her husband or of any of his male and
female relatives save those who are younger than she. There is no harm
done in taking the name of a husband, but through a sense of shame she
does not repeat it.
[37] The _Urghi_ consists of _dooav_ grass, rice and _alta_ (a thin red
stuff made of cotton like paper with which Hindoo females daub their
feet,) previously consecrated to the goddess Doorga, and is supposed to
possess a peculiar virtue in promoting felicity and relieving distress.
[38] Hindoos are so passionately fond of their children, male or female,
that they can but ill brook the idea of a segregation, even under
circumstances where it is unavoidable. Hence wealthy families often keep
their sons-in-law under their own roof. Sometimes this is done from
vanity. Such sons-in-law generally become indolent and effeminate,
destitute alike of mental activity and physical energy. They eat, drink,
smoke, play and sleep. Fattening on the ample resources of their
father-in-law they contract demoralizing habits, which engender vice and
profligacy. The late Baboos Ramdoolal Dey, Ramruttun Roy, Prannauth
Chowdry, the Tagore families, the old Rajahs of Calcutta and some of the
newly fledged English made Rajahs and others, countenanced this
practice, and the result is, they have left with but few exceptions a
number of men singularly deficient in good moral character. These men
are called _Ghar Jamayes_, or home bred sons-in-law, which is a term of
reproach among all persons who have a spark of independence about them.
The late Baboo Dinno Bundho Mitter, the celebrated author of "_Nil
Durpun_," strongly satirises such characters in a book called "_Jamay
Bareek_." While on this subject I may as well mention here that Baboo
Ramdoolal Dey of Calcutta, who had risen from obscurity to great
opulence, had five daughters, to each of whom he gave a marriage dowry
of Rupees 50,000 in Government securities, and 10,000 Rupees for a
house. Of course all his sons-in-law were first class _Koolins_, and
used to live under the roof of their father-in-law. Some of their sons
and grandsons are now ranked amongst the Hindoo millionaires of this
great City, while most of the members of the original stock have
dwindled into insignificance, strikingly illustrating the instability of
fortune.
[39] The use of an iron bangle or bracelet has a deep meaning, it
outlasts gold and silver ones. A girl may wear gold ornaments set in
precious stones to the value of ten or fifteen thousand Rupees, but an
_iron_ bangle worth a pice,--a veritable insignia of _ayestreehood_
opposed to widowhood--is indispensable to a married woman for its
comparatively durable quality. A young widow may wear gold bangles till
her twentieth year, but she is not privileged to put on an iron bangle
after the death of her husband.
[40] In the early part of the British Government in Bengal, _cowries_
were the common currency of the Province in the ordinary transactions of
life. People used to make their _hautbazar_ (market) with _cowries_, and
a family that made a daily bazar with sixteen or eighteen _kahuns_ of
cowries, equal to one rupee or so, was reckoned a very respectable
family. The prices of provisions ranged nearly one-third of what they
now are. Even the revenues of Government were sometimes paid in cowries
in the Eastern districts, namely, Assam, Sylhet, &c.
[41] There is a custom amongst the Hindoos that a married woman
considers it no disgrace but rather an act of merit to eat the residue
of her husband's meal in his absence; so great is the respect in which a
husband is held, and so warm the sympathy existing between them. Even an
elderly woman, the mother of five or six children, cheerfully partakes
of the residue, as if it were the orts of gods.
[42] It is a noteworthy fact that in contracting matrimonial alliances,
some families placed in mediocre circumstances are satisfied with taking
a certain sum of money in lieu of the presents mentioned, partly because
the articles are mostly of a perishable nature, and partly because the
making presents of money to numerous servants for their trouble and
feeding them, is regarded more as a tax than anything else. They prefer
utility to show. Even in such cases of verbal contract, the father of
the bride must send at least thirty servants with presents, besides 100
or 150 Rupees in cash as is stipulated before.
[43] In making the above imitations, Hindoo females exhibit an
astonishing degree of skill and ingenuity which, if directed by the hand
of an expert, is capable of still further improvement. Naturally and
instinctively they evince a great aptitude for learning all sorts of
handiwork.
[44] It is perhaps not generally known that the dinner of a native,
Hindoo or Mussulman, male or female, is not considered complete, until
he chews his _pan beera_ or betel. The bridegroom after eating and
washing his mouth chews his usual _pan_, and is asked to give a portion
thereof to the bride; he hesitates at first, but consents at length to
give it into the right hand of his elder brother's wife, who forcibly
thrusts the same into the mouth of the bride, observing at the same time
that their mutual repugnance on this score will soon be overcome when
their incipient affection grows into true love.
[45] _Jarawya_ jewellery is set in precious stones, the value of which
it is not easy to estimate.
[46] A Hindoo _Ayistree_ female, _i. e._, one whose husband is alive,
whether young or old, is religiously forbidden to take off _balla_
(bangle) from her hands, if is a badge of _Ayistreeism_, even when dead
red thread is substituted in the place of the _balla_, so great is the
importance attached to it by _Ayistree_ females. When the _balla_ is not
seen on the hand, it is called the _raur hatha_, or the hand of a widow,
than which there could not be a more reproachful term.
[47] _Gharbasath_ implies dwelling in a father-in-law's house. If the
bride do not go there within eight days from the date of marriage, she
could not do so for one year, but after _gharbasath_ she can go and come
back any time when necessary. The object is to impress on her mind that
her father-in-law's house is her future home. It is on this occasion
that the worship of _Shoobachini_ already described is performed, and
both the bridegroom and bride are taken to _Kally Ghat_ to sanctify the
hallowed union and obtain the blessings of the goddess.
[48] It is perhaps not generally known that some women, not from any
malicious design but rather from the ennui of a monotonous life, as well
as for the sake of amusement in which they might participate, make a
secret combination, and invent some artificial means to prematurely drag
the girl--the poor victim of superstition--into the _Teerghur_ before
she actually arrives at the age of puberty.
[49] This part of the rite is called _Kada_ or mire. A small pool is dug
in the court-yard and some water thrown into it;--two women, the one
personating a Rajah (King) and the other, a Ranee (Queen) feign to bathe
in the pool, change their clothes, put on straw ornaments and dine on
the refuse of vegetables, while the songstress recites all sorts of
obscene songs and the females hide their faces through shame. This loose
and ludicrous representation proves nauseating even to those for whose
amusement it is performed. We cannot regard in any other light than as a
relic of unmitigated barbarism.
VI.
THE BROTHER FESTIVAL.
Any social institution that has a tendency to promote the growth of
genuine love and affection between man and woman, is naturally conducive
to the happiness of both. In this sublunary vale of tears, where
unalloyed felicity is but transient and short lived, even a temporary
exemption from the cares and anxieties of the world adds at least some
moments of pleasure to life. The _Bhratridvitiya,_ or _fraternal_ rite
of the Hindoos, is an institution of this nature, being admirably
calculated to cement the natural bond of union between brothers and
sisters of the same family. Bhratridvitiya, as the name imports, takes
place on the second day of the new moon immediately following the Kali
Poojah or Dewali. On the morning of this day, a brother comes to the
house of a sister, and receives from her hand the usual benedictive
present of unhusked rice, doova grass and sandal, with a wealth of good
wishes for his long, prosperous life, and the happy commemoration of the
event from year to year. The brother in return reciprocates, and putting
a Rupee or two into her hands, expresses a similar good wish, with the
addition that she may long continue to enjoy the blessings of a conjugal
life,--a benediction which she values over every other worldly
advantage. The main object of this festival is to renovate and intensify
the warmth of affection between kith and kin of both sexes by blessing
each other on a particular day of the year. It is a sort of family
reunion, pre-eminently calculated to recall the early reminiscences of
life, and to freshen up fraternal and sisterly love. No ritualistic rite
or priestly interposition is necessary for the purpose, it being a
purely social institution, originating in the love that sweetens life.
After interchanging salutations, the sister who has every thing ready
thrice invokes a blessing upon the brother in a Bengali verse, and marks
his forehead thrice with sandal paste by the tip of her little finger.
She then serves him with the provisions provided for the festive
occasion. Here genuine love and true affection almost spontaneously gush
forth from the heart of the sister towards one who is united to her by
the nearest tie of consanguinity and tenderest remembrances. If the
brother be not inclined to relish or taste a particular dish, how
affectionately does she cajole him to try it, adding at the same time
that it has been prepared by her own hand with the greatest care. Any
little dislike evinced by the brother instantly bathes her eyes in
tears, and disposes her to exclaim somewhat in the following strain:
"Why is this slight towards a poor sister who has been up till twelve
o'clock last night to prepare for you the _chunderpooley_ and
_Khirarchach_ (two sorts of home-made sweetmeats) regardless of the
cries of _Khoka_ (the baby)." Such a pathetic, tender expression bursting
from the lips of a loving sister cannot fail to melt a brother's heart,
and overcome his dislike.
About four o'clock in the afternoon, the sister sends, as tangible
memorials of her affection, presents of clothes and sweetmeats to the
house of the brother, fondly indulging in the hope that they may be
acceptable to him. On this particular day, Hindoo homes as well as the
streets of Calcutta in the native part of the town, present the lively
appearance of a national jubilee. Each of the brothers of the family
visits each of the sisters in turn. Hundreds of male and female servants
are busily engaged in carrying presents, and return home quite
delighted. On such occasions the heart of a Hindoo female, naturally
soft and tender, becomes doubly expansive when the outflow of love and
affection on her part is fully reciprocated by the effusion of good
wishes on the part of her brother.
VII.
THE SON-IN-LAW FESTIVAL.
If not precisely analogous in all its prominent fea
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